tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-72766784055826561212024-03-05T04:49:50.779-08:00Higher Living for WomenAnonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.comBlogger19125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-15302242416641947052017-05-14T16:02:00.000-07:002017-05-14T16:02:17.032-07:00THOUGHTS ON MOTHERHOOD<div class="p1">
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<span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-size: 12px;">When I was pregnant with my first child, I felt unsure how this motherhood thing would go. I was afraid that I would do the wrong thing and that I would mess up my kids. Then when my daughter was born and I held her in my arms and felt that connection that is so deep there are no words to describe, I realized that my world had completely changed and that no matter what happened next, I would be willing to do whatever it took to do my best for my children.</span><span style="-webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; font-size: 12px;"> </span></div>
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<span class="s1"><b>What I could not foresee in that moment of newborn bliss was that in the coming months and years, I would be stretched beyond my capacity in meekness, love and temperance</b>. Now that several years have passed and I have three incredible daughters, I would like to reflect on my journey so far in being a mother. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">I feel that there is so much pressure on women. Pressure to be perfect mothers, to have the perfect home, to look perfect in makeup and style, and to act perfectly but the reality is that we are not perfect! One of the biggest lies that keeps us stuck is that we are supposed to be perfect! This is simply not true. Our Creator made us imperfect, so we could learn, grow and become. It is in our imperfection that get stretched and become more of who we are meant to be. Children increase our capacity greater than anything else could. They have the ability to elicit such feelings of love that we can barely comprehend it. They also have the ability to push us to our edges and can bring feelings of frustration, anger, sadness and guilt to the surface. When we have children and are faced with lack of sleep, pushing boundaries, stress and worry over their wellbeing, our character gets stretched.</span></div>
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<span class="s1">So given the reality that we are all stretched being parents, what determines if we will grow from the experience and become more of our potential or shrink? I believe that our ability to be empowered to become more of who our Creator wants us to be is determined by three things. The first is our faith in our Creator and His ability to use our experiences in this life to help us to become greater. The second is our ability to get back up when we make mistakes. We all make mistakes in this life. That is to be expected. When we are able to get back up and do the next right thing, that is what defines us. The third is our ability to forgive. Forgive ourselves, forgive others, and trust that our Creator forgives us. I know that having faith, getting back up from mistakes, and forgiveness unleashes our greatest capacity to love and care for our children in a way that empowers our best self. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">To all mothers, I hope that you know these simple but life changing truths. I hope you know there really is a Creator who loves you and is grateful for all you do in this divine role you hold as a mother. If you don’t know this, I encourage you to pray about it so you can know for yourself it is true. I hope you know that you don’t have to be perfect and that as long as you are striving to get back up when you make mistakes and take the lesson, you are doing amazing! I hope you know that the role of motherhood truly impacts the world greater than anything else we can do in this life. Mothers have brought into being every person who has ever lived or will live. Mothers have the greatest influence on children and who they will become. We have the capacity to teach our kids how to love, how to live, how to forgive, how to know their Creator, and how to reach their full potential. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">When life gets tough and you are in the trenches of dirty diapers, laundry mountains, fighting children, and messy houses, please know that you are enough. Although this work of raising children is divine, it is often messy, unpredictable and in the day to day can at times feel like the movie Ground Hog Day. However, each day builds upon one another and in the midst of imperfection, we teach our kids how to get back up when they mess up, how to love even when you don’t feel loving, and what it means to be a mother. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">I think about my own mother and all she has given to me. I feel like when I was a child, I couldn’t see the millions of things she did everyday for me. Now I am filled with gratitude and love for her and all the many sacrifices she has made for me. </span></div>
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<span class="s1">I know that motherhood is a divine role. I know it is supposed to be messy and that we are supposed to be imperfect. I know that as we get back up, have faith, and forgive, that the Creator can help us become who we are meant to be. Mothers, you are amazing and you are making a greater difference in this life than you can imagine. </span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-55673324877969420582017-02-06T06:39:00.004-08:002017-02-07T06:45:17.056-08:00SETTING AND ACHIEVING GOALS<div style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); -webkit-text-stroke-width: initial; background-color: white; font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 14px; line-height: normal;">
Around January 1st we all have a drive within us that compels us to reflect on the year that has passed and re-evaluate what we want to do and who we want to become in the coming year. For most people however, the goals we set on January 1st usually are forgotten by January 15th. Why is that? Why would we have a desire to do something but have things get in our way and frustrate our efforts to create the changes we want? It’s not because we are lazy or unmotivated or fickle as a pickle. It is for a reason that is actually quite simple and quite solvable. </div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">You see, as we are moving towards our goals what happens is that a number of things tend to come up and can block us from achieving what we want. These blockers are; lack of faith in our ability to accomplish the goal, failure that we experience as we attempt to reach the goal, negative comments and beliefs from ourselves and friends and family, a feeling like we don’t have enough time and analysis paralysis. <b>As we are stepping towards our goals, these blockers come up and if we don’t know how to jump over them and move past them, we can be stopped from accomplishing the goal. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">So how do we jump over these goal blockers? Notice that I said how do we get past them, not how do we avoid them? That is because everyone in the whole world experiences these goal blockers to one degree or another. It is natural that they come up and to some degree even helpful. You see <b>when we understand that they are going to come up and we learn how to overcome them, we develop a strength of character that is much greater than if we could have just easily done what we sought out to do in the first place</b>. </span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>So how we do we jump over these goal blockers?</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">To understand how we do this, we must first understand what a goal is and know how to set the goal in such a way that we are most likely to achieve it. There has been much said about goal setting and there is an acronym that is used frequently in goal setting. I love this acronym because there is a great deal of truth in it, however I have made one modification that is essential to really help us achieve our goals.</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">If we are missing this critical piece, we can miss the mark on what we want to achieve in this life. <b>It is something that most goal setting gurus don’t talk about or explain but is critical to achieving success in any area of life. </b>It is the one thing that helps us leap over all the things that hold us back from reaching our goals and allows us to move past our self doubt, lack of time and fear of failure to step towards the life we desire. I learned about this missing link at an event called <a href="http://www.masteryourpowerwithin.com/events.php" target="_blank">Master Your Power Within</a>. I wish I could share with you all the things I learned about setting goals but this information was covered over the course of several days. I will however share with you this one critical piece because if you use it, it will be incredibly valuable in helping you achieve success. </span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">The missing link that rockets us forward towards our goals is applying a motivator to our small, consistent, daily steps towards our goals. This means that when we do our daily goal we get to do something we enjoy but if we don’t do our daily goal we miss out on something. This motivator must be powerful enough to drive us to take action.</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">Now that we understand how critical it is to have a motivator in place, what are all of the steps needed to set a clear goal that will help us to be successful in achieving it? It is to be smart about setting our goals. How do we be smart in goal setting? This is how…</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none; font-size: 20px; line-height: normal;"><b>S</b></span><span style="font-kerning: none;">pecific - We set a specific goal </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none; font-size: 20px; line-height: normal;"><b>M</b></span><span style="font-kerning: none;">otivation - We set a reward if we do it and a consequence if we don’t </span><span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none; font-size: 20px; line-height: normal;"><b>A</b></span><span style="font-kerning: none;">countable - We set up a system to be accountable to doing our goal</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none; font-size: 20px; line-height: normal;"><b>R</b></span><span style="font-kerning: none;">ealistic - We make sure it’s a measurable goal that we are likely able to achieve</span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none; font-size: 20px; line-height: normal;"><b>T</b></span><span style="font-kerning: none;">imely - We set a deadline to complete the goal</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">Here is an example of using S.M.A.R.T. goal setting. </span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Specific</b> - I will workout every weekday for half an hour</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Motivation</b> - If I do it, I can check my e-mail</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">If I don’t do it, I can’t check my email</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Accountable</b> - I will tell my husband if I worked out or not</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Realistic</b> - I will run on Tuesday, Wednesday & Friday and life weights on Monday and Thursday</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Timely</b> - I will do this type of workout for the next 30 days</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">PRINCIPLES IN ACTION</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">I was wanting to write a book but I had no time to actually sit down and write it. I am a busy mom with 2 toddlers, I own my own business and I work from home. I had intentions to write but never actually did it until I committed to writing my book for 15 minutes every morning at 6:30 am (see how I used SMART goals to set a consistent daily step towards my goals). Then I attached a motivator to it. If I wrote in my book for 15 minutes I could take a shower. If I did not write in my book for 15 minutes, I couldn't take a shower. I became more motivated than ever before to write in my book so I would avoid feeling gross! I remember one night at 10 pm frantically writing in my book for 15 minutes so I could finally have a shower! </span></div>
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<span style="-webkit-font-kerning: none;">DIGGING DEEP</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">Now that we understand what goals are, what can get in our way, how to set clear and specific goals, and how to put motivators in place to actually accomplish them, we are good to go right? Well almost. Now it is time for a little less conversation, a little more action (as Elvis would put it). </span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Specific</b> - What is one specific goal you have this week?</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Motivation -</b> What reward will you get if you do it? What consequence will you get if you don’t do it?</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Accountable</b> - What will you do to be accountable to this goal? </span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Realistic</b> - How is this goal realistic & measurable?</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;"><b>Timely</b> - What specific time will you work on achieving this goal daily?</span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">Now that you understand how to set and achieve goals, the ball is in your court. Either you can dismiss what I have said as something you have heard before, or you can take this message seriously and use this knowledge to propel you forward toward your dreams. It is within you to work towards and accomplish what you truly desire that is good and that you are willing to work for. So go ahead, take that first step. After all, that is how all things come to pass. </span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">I promise that as you do this, you will be lifted and strengthened. You will receive help from the Creator and you will be able to achieve things you did not think were possible. You see, when we are in momentum, doing our best, and committed to being our best, the Creator helps us move forward. </span></div>
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<span style="font-kerning: none;">Please comment below about the goals you have and your thoughts about this article. I would love to hear from you! What other topics would you like to know about that would help you to succeed in your goals? </span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-39359425911089905282016-12-20T05:52:00.001-08:002016-12-20T06:50:17.274-08:005 STEPS TO CHRISTMAS BLISS<div style="font-family: -webkit-standard; font-size: 14px;">
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">Want to feel bliss at Christmas time like my baby Isla?</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">I was talking to a friend yesterday who said "I just don't understand why I don't feel that peaceful feeling at Christmas. Instead I just feel stressed?" I know why! Because traditionally as women we do EVERYTHING to prepare for Christmas. We plan, buy and wrap the gifts, plan the dinners, buy the food for the dinners, prepare the dinners, clean the house, make special Christmas treats, plan and make gifts for neighbours, teachers, and write and send all the Christmas cards. If you are reading this and feeling tired already...you should! It's exhausting! </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><b>Is it a surprise that come Christmas morning we are exhausted? </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">Add on this the extra stress of how we're going to pay for all of it, family dynamics, lack of sleep, and sugar crashing and we are on a train to Christmas contention. So now that I've reviewed all the tough stuff about Christmas. <b>Are we doomed to a holiday season of stress and exhaustion or can Christmas really be blissful? </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">I've got some good news and bad news for you. The good news is that it is possible to feel bliss this time of year and feel more connected with the people you love than ever before. The bad news is that it takes some work to do it and some letting go of the idea that Christmas needs to be perfect. What is Christmas can be perfectly imperfect? What if there can be moments of calm and peace amidst the chaos of holiday business around us? </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">What are some of the ways I have found helpful to create Christmas bliss & avoid all the things that can steal our holidays? These are a couple of ways we have simplified the season in our family and it has made a big difference in helping us to enjoy the holidays more. <b>These steps don't mean that everything is perfect but they do make the holiday season a lot more enjoyable, less stressful and more meaningful to our family. </b></span></span><br />
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<b style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">Here are the 5 steps to Christmas bliss that will get you there.</span></b><br />
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<b style="font-family: Times, 'Times New Roman', serif;"><span style="font-size: large;">5 STEPS TO CHRISTMAS BLISS</span></b></div>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14px;"><br /></span><b><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">1. SIMPLIFY THE SEASON</span></span></b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">One of the the things we do is buy less gifts. I know…sounds crazy right? We have just found that when we stick to buying our kids 1-3 gifts for our kids, they enjoy them more.<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">We also found that when we make sure the gifts fit into our budge<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">t<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">, we can truly enj<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">oy Christmas. One year I had an epifany when our kids <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">drawers were so full that we could not close them whi<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">le we were trying to jam in<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> their new christmas cloth<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">es in. I realized that sometimes our kids are given <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">second hand clothes and toys that look just like new. I also realized that <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">when we buy a toy for them<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">, they are n<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ot interested in the box and <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">50 billion t<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">wist ties holding the toy in place. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">So why <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">not set aside toy<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">s or clothes all year that look new and give them as Christmas gifts<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> or buy gifts at a gar<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">age s<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ale or from Crai<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">gslist? <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">One year we bought a <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">kids blowup <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">waters<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">lide <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">that had been used once and </span>was worth $600 new for $50 from a garage sale for our daughter's gift</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">and it was the be<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">st <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">gift ever</span></span></span>! </span>We are being greener o<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">n our pocketbook and greener on the environment. <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Do<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">es that <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">mean we never buy new gifts? No<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">...there are some things that jus<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">t need to be new but we are resourceful with the <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">gifts we give. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">Another thing we do that might sound really insane so hold onto your Christmas cap is that we don't buy gifts for our partner. I know that might sound grinchy but over the years we found that we just weren’t getting the joy we desired from opening sweaters and nick-nacs for each other. So rather than buy each other gifts, my husband Andy and I have a "super Christmas date". What’s a super Christmas date you might be thinking. Well it is something extra special that we decide on together to celebrate Christmas…over the years it has varied from going on a one night mini vacation, going shopping together after Christmas or going for an extra fancy dinner or a sleigh ride. Anything that is really special that we would not normally do on a date night. That way we have more bright futures…Christmas and our super Christmas date after Christmas. </span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14px;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">2. REMEMBER THE MEANING OF CHRISTMAS</span></b></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">Another thing we do as a family is talk about what this holiday season truly means and plan how we can honor the true spirit of Christmas. Some ways we have done that is by collecting food for the food bank, talking about the gifts we can give to our Creator, planning exciting things to do as a family and searching for ways we can help the people around us. I know that each family is unique and what works for our family may not work for others so the important thing is to find what works best for you and your family. This year one of the things we are doing is an <a href="https://www.lds.org/blog/bc/images/light-the-world.pdf?lang=eng">advent calendar</a> that reminds of how we can follow Christ's example this holiday season and serve those around us.</span></span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14px;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;"><b>3. YOUR PRESENCE IS THE BEST PRESENT</b></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">Ins<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">tead of having our focus on stuff at Christmas, we <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">focus on things we can do together as a family. We have all <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">sorts of awesome tradi<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">tions t<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">hat we do. Infact we have a<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">n advent calendar that is a large Christmas <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">moose...you heard right...a Christmas moose with material pockets that we put <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ideas of all the fun things we can do and how we can serve others <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">each day during the holdiays. <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">These range from <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">making cookies to bringing a neigh<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">bour a dinner. We <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">also have some year<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ly tra<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ditions that we look forward to all year like our anual Christmas Scavenger Hunt<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">. This is where we <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">invite our f<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">riends an<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">d <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">family to <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">join us in a bunch of awesome activiti<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">es as we race to see who can finish<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> the hunt fastest. <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">On<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">e of my favorite <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">mem<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ories is of my mom sledding down a hill on a piece of cardboard during the scavenger hunt!</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Let go of <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">perfection! The hol<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">idays do not need to be perfect<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">. All families have ups and downs and if you know that sometimes the holda<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ys get messy and there will be times when everyone is not smiling in the Christ<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">mas photo, you will have a much better time of things!</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> <b></b></div>
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: 14px;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">4. TAKE CARE OF YOURSELF</span></b></span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">SLEEP</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">State is everything<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">. It is how we see the world and how we experience our family and events that happen. There are a couple things we can do that are pivitol in managing our state of mind. The first <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">is that we need to get enough<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> sleep. I kno<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">w it can be particularly difficult during the holidays but if we are really going to enjoy them, we need sleep! There have been studies <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">done that show if <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">we are suffering from lack of sleep we <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">have the same ju<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">dgement as someone who is intoxicated<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">! </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">NUTRITION</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Another one that is critical is to have good nutrit<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ion. We <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">don'<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">t need the sugar <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">c<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">rashes robbing us of our happy <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">holiday mem<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ories!<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">So with all this delicious sugary temptations around how<b> are we supposed to enjoy the holidays when we are so hopped up on sugar that our state of mind is constantly crashing</b>? What is the answer? Is it to completely avoid sugar and when a friendly neighbor knocks on your door with a fresh batch of sugar cookies to slam the door and throw there cookies in their face? Um no I’m not saying that at all…that wouldn’t be the spirit of Christmas now would it! What I’m suggesting is to be aware of the sugar crash that happens after we gobble up those yummy holiday treats, find healthier alternatives (I have a healthy raw chocolate peppermint cookie recipe that is awesome) and if we do indulge on the sweet treats just eat them in moderation and if possible towards the end of the evening so kids and grown ups can be in bed drifting off to sleep during the crash rather than saying mean things to each other. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">EXERCISE</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">It is critical for us to <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">move our bodies to manage our state of mind. The cool thing<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> about this is that we can do it in whatever way works best for us. W<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">hether that means going for a walk, running, yoga<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">...anything <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">that gets your body moving! Let's offset some of those <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">yummy and not so good for us treats we are going to induldge in by making in a priority to keep moving our bodies this hol<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">iday season. Most importantly though when we move our body we feel happier, it pumps in great feeling endorphins that make us love our family more! So take your kids for a walk or sleddi<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ng or just do yoga in yo<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ur living room...<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">do whatever it take<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">s to move your body! </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span> </div>
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<h3>
<b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">5. SERVE</span></b></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">There is something special about the holidays that help us to reach beyond ourselves and think of those who are struggling and who don't have the things they need. There is a spirit of community and coming together to serve those around us. I know that when I have focused on serving those around me, especially during this busy season, that it when I can experience true joy and the spirit of Christmas is tangible. Service can. be in so many different forms. It may be complimenting someone, or telling someone you love them, or going to visit a person who is sick. It is absolutely anything that uplifts another. There is a Quaker Proverb that says "Thee life me, I'll life thee, and we'll ascend together eternally." <b>When we uplift another, we are also uplifted and strengthened and given the gift of peace. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><b></b></span></span></div>
<h3>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">DIGGING DEEP</span></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Okay so now you are armed with knowledge about the <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">holiday stealers <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">that are lurking about trying to take <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">away your holiday fun and you kno<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">w the 5 steps to C<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">histmas bliss. <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Now it's time to make a plan so that you can use thi<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">s information to create the holdiay season that you want. It doesn't have to be perfect but I promise using these things will make it better than you can imagain<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">e<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">. It will take some work on your part though. Are you committed to creat<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ing a holiday season that is less stress and more fun? Are you willing to let go of <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">so<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">me past expectations <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">and belie<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">fs that you <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">have had about what the holdiays "should" be? Are you willing <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">to do what it takes to put yourself first in a happy, healthy<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">, productive way<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> so you can be the person you want to be for those you love? If you <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">an<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">swered ye<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">s to any<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> of th<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ose q<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">uestions then you are ready so let's begin! </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><b></b></div>
<ul style="font-size: 14px;"></ul>
<ol style="font-size: 14px;">
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">So what is 1 thing you can do to simplify the season<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"> this year?</span></span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">What does Christmas mean to you and how can you make sure that meaning is central to your holidays? </span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">What famil<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">y traditions can you create this year that will create happy mem<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">ories f<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">or your family?</span></span></span></span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">What is <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">something you can do daily to take even better care of you<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">rself by getting enough sleep, having great nutrition or getting exercise? </span></span></span> </span></span></span></span> </li>
</ol>
<ul style="font-size: 14px;"></ul>
<div style="font-size: 14px;">
<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">I know that doing these things has made a makes a huge difference in helping us love the holidays again. I know that as find ways to avoid the holiday stealers and find more ways to be even more present and create a simplified holiday season, you will feel more peace, joy and happiness this Christmas. I wish you and your family all the love and happiness that your heart can hold this holiday season. </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">Much love,</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">Connie</span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-15353799213116091702016-11-18T05:19:00.003-08:002016-11-18T05:19:11.683-08:003 STEPS TO RELATIONSHIPS GREATNESS<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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In my last post we explored what bonding is, what gets in the way of us feeling bonded and how we respond when we do not feel connected with the people we love most (<a href="http://higherlivingforwomen.blogspot.com/2016/11/how-we-connect-with-people-we-love.html">HOW WE CONNECT WITH THE PEOPLE WE LOVE</a> ). Now that we understand these things, we need to dive in a little deeper to discover what causes us to be disconnected with the people we love the most and what we can do to reconnect when this happens. <br />
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<b>OVERVIEW OF BONDING</b><br />
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A quick review of bonding is that we need to feel bonded to those closest to us, especially our partner. Research has shown that this bonding is critical to our emotional and physical health. Dr. Sue Johnson is a leading expert in attachment and she indicates that when we do not feel bonded to our partner, our brain physically responds with a flight or flight response and we experience a feeling of panic and fear that our partner will leave us or that they don’t have our back. This break in bonding happens when we have a bonding injury. A bonding injury is basically when an incident occurs in the relationship that causes us to feel disconnected or abandoned in the relationship and causes a feeling of panic. Bonding injuries can be caused by the intentional or unintentional actions of our partner. When a bonding injury happens, we respond in one of three ways:<br />
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<b>Anxious</b> - looks for reassurance from their partner that the relationship is okay <br />
<b>Avoidant</b> - retreats from the danger by distancing themselves from the relationships<br />
<b>Securely attached</b> - feeling safe and secure in the relationship and knowing the other person has your back<br />
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These ways of responding are patterns that we have developed in childhood and carry with us into our adult relationships. These patterns are not fixed though and we can change them if we have a partner that is attentive, responsive and engaged. <br />
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Okay so now that we have refreshed our mind about the principles about bonding, <b>lets dive in a deeper about how attachment injuries occur, how we can create them unintentionally, and how we recover from them. </b><br />
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<b>BONDING INJURIES</b><br />
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Our bonding style comes out when there is a bonding injury. A bonding injury happens when we say or do something that creates emotional distress with our partner. Often bonding injuries happen by accident when we say or do something that hits an emotional sore spot with the other person. <b>An emotional sore spot happens when we have a painful experience caused from our partner or someone else that we are emotionally sensitive about.</b> When our partner accidentally hits that emotional sore spot, we react automatically. It is not a logic response but it is experienced in a very real way. <br />
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I remember one time Andy had committed to spending time with me but life got busy and he forgot about his commitment. I was finishing tidying up the kitchen and when I went to him to spend time together, he was asleep. I knew that he did not mean to fall asleep but that did not stop me from feeling frustrated and disappointed. When he woke up hours later I was angry with him and we had a fight. I had a sore spot from years ago when he would sometimes promise to spend time with me and then we would train kung fu instead. After realizing this was a raw spot for me and telling him about it, Andy told me that he didn’t mean to fall asleep and that he wished I would have woke him up because he was disappointed too that we did not get to spend time together. When I realized my raw spot and shared it with him, it helped both him and I to understand what was going on for me and why I was reacting in that way. I helped us to come closer together and become even more connected than before. <br />
<b><br />HOW TO GET AND STAY BONDED</b><br />
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The goal is for us to get and stay securely bonded with the person we love the most. This is critical because when we are securely bonded, we feel emotionally secure in our relationship, we feel less stress physically and we experience greater overall physical health. <b>Securing bonding has even been associated with having fewer heart attacks and relapses of heart conditions.</b><br />
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Dr. Sue Johnson shared in her book Hold Me Tight that “In Cleveland, researchers at Case Western Reserve University asked men with a history of angina and high blood pressure, “Does your wife show her love?” Those who answered “No” suffered almost twice as many angina episodes during the next five years as did those who replied “Yes.” Women’s hearts are affected, too. Women who view their marriages as strained and have regular hostile interactions with their partners are more likely to have significantly elevated blood pressure and higher levels of stress hormones compared with women in happy marriages. Yet another study found that women who had had a heart attack stood a threefold higher risk of having another if there was discord in their marriage. In men and women with congestive heart failure, the state of the patient’s marriage is as good a predictor of survival after four years as the severity of the symptoms and degree of impairment, concludes Jim Coyne, a psychologist at the University of Pennsylvania.”<br />
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So being securely attached is good for our heart…literally! So if it is so important for this secure bonding to happen, how do we achieve it in our relationships? There are <b>3 steps to bonding that will not only help us get securely bonded but will help us to stay there even after a bonding injury. </b><br />
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<b>3 STEPS TO BONDING</b><br />
<ol>
<li>Lead with vulnerability </li>
<li>Share what you are most afraid of</li>
<li>Ask for what you need from your partner to feel safe & loved (be specific)</li>
</ol>
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Lead with vulnerability means that you share how you are feeling with your partner in an open and loving way. Share what you are most afraid of means to share how you are afraid of being left alone or your partner does not have your back. Ask for what you need from your partner to feel safe and loved means to ask for what you want your partner to do. <br />
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<b>So often we want our partner to change but we do not ask them specifically for what we want.</b> How can they possibly know what to do when we are not specific about what we want them to do? I remember talking to this woman once who had been married for a long time. She was frustrated at her partner because he didn’t spend time with her and spent all his time on an activity that he enjoyed. When I asked her what she would like him to do she responded with “I don’t know”. How can he do what she wants him to do if she doesn’t know what she wants him to do and is not able to ask for it? <br />
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<b>PRINCIPLES IN ACTION</b><br />
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Here is an example of how the 3 steps of bonding works in real life. One time I was talking to Andy and his mom about the research surrounding a health risk I was concerned about. As I sited the research, Andy chimed in that the research was unreliable and that it wasn’t my fault that I didn’t know that, after all he had a masters degree and was not trained how to understand research. Now I know that my loving husband was not implying that I am stupid but he rubbed a sore spot of mine. I am sensitive about not having my masters degree and sometimes feel that he is more intelligent than I am because he remembers information that I don't remember. So when he made the comment, even though he didn’t mean it like this, what I heard is “it’s not your fault you’re stupid” and that created a bonding injury. I went off my to room feeling hurt. Andy came in after me and although he knew I was upset, he didn’t understand why. This caused him to be afraid of the disconnection between us so he began to reconnect with me using the 3 steps of bonding. He said that he could feel the disconnection and was worried that he had done something wrong to hurt me. <br />
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<b>Lead with vulnerability</b> - He shared that he didn’t know what he did wrong but he was sorry for whatever it was. <br />
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<b>Share what you are most afraid of</b> - He shared that the disconnection caused him to feel panic about our relationship and a fear of being not good enough. <br />
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<b>Ask for what he need</b> - He asked for what he needed by saying that he needed me to tell him what he had done and how I was feeling. <br />
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This reaching out by him caused my heart to soften and I reached back with the 3 steps to bonding. <br />
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<b>Lead with vulnerability</b> - I told him that I was feeling hurt by his comment about me not understanding the research and that I was sensitive about it because I don’t have a masters degree. <br />
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<b>Share what you are most afraid of</b> - I shared that I was afraid that he thought I was stupid because of that. <br />
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<b>Ask for what you need</b> - I asked him for what I need by reassuring me that he respects me. He responded with my feelings in a loving way and held me. <br />
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It doesn’t always happen that both partners use the 3 steps to bonding but in our case at that moment it worked for us both to use it. My heart was softened by Andy being vulnerable and that created space for me to use the 3 steps to bonding as well. After doing this, we were connected again and closer than we were before. <br />
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<b>DIGGING DEEP</b><br />
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Now that you understand the basics of bonding, know what can get in the way of us staying bonded with our partners, have an awareness of bonding injuries and sore spots and know the 3 steps of bonding, you are prepared to be even more connected with the people you love. This is a preparation that will require action on your part though. In this busy world of a million things to do and competing pulls for our attention at every turn, we as women need to commit to creating a connected and bonded relationship. I believe that women often lead the way in relationships and as they make changes and move forward, their partners see that change and are inspired to change in their own time. I see this so often as a Master Coach. So often women will come to a life changing <a href="http://www.masteryourpowerwithin.com/events.php">Master Your Power Within</a> event for the first time on their own. They express that they are concerned about coming to the event without their partner because they need things to improve in their relationship. So the women, out of a desire to do all it takes to change and filled with pure grit and courage, come to the event. <br />
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Then they change. <br />
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They create real results in their lives of feeling happier, more calm, more supportive of their partner and family and more able to create financial results and their partner sees it. Soon after, their partner notices the changes they are making and a desire to change within themselves grows.<br />
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The question is will you be a leader in your own life? <br />
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Will you be willing to search for and become aware when a bonding injury happen or will you just let it pass you by because it’s easier than rocking the boat of your relationship equilibrium? <br />
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<b>Will you settle for the status quo of dissatisfaction and frustration with your partner or will you create real bonding with sometimes tough and vulnerable conversations? </b><br />
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You are reading this so I know you are determined to create real results in your life. I know that you are not willing to settle for the status quo of dissatisfaction and regret. I know that you are willing to fight for who you love. <br />
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The time begins now. <br />
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The step you will take is to implement what you have learned. To look for patterns of disconnection in your relationship, to gain an awareness of when there is a bonding break and your reaction to it and to use the 3 steps to get close again with the person you love the most. <b>If you need some support in getting started click here for a <a href="https://calendly.com/andy-benjamin/initial/11-21-2016">free session with a Master Coach</a>.</b> We will do whatever it takes to support you in achieving greatness in your relationship.<br />
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I promise you that as you do this you will feel more supported and loved by your partner. You will see them in a new light, a light of potential and hope. You will gain a deeper understanding of yourself and them and you will begin to fall in love with them all over again. I know that as you take these courageous steps you will be supported by your Creator and that you will receive inspiration about how to be even closer with your partner. You will receive an added measure of grace. <br />
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I know these things are true and I am excited for you to embark on this journey of discovery and connection. <b>The safest place to be in this world is in the loving open arms of the person we love most when we are truly connected. </b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-8502840472254463002016-11-10T06:00:00.001-08:002016-11-10T06:02:50.492-08:00HOW WE CONNECT WITH THE PEOPLE WE LOVE<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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For years I could not understand why sometimes I felt so close and loved by my husband, while other times he could hurt me so deeply and send me into a frenzy of frustration and bitterness. What was the difference between those times? I have come to understand that <b>the only difference between the times of feeling close with the people we love most or feeling distant is our level of bonding. </b>I came to this conclusion through the incredible work of Dr. Sue Johnson in her books “Love Sense” and “Hold Me Tight” and I came to these truths through the exploration and discovery of my own life and relationships. <br />
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Why is it important to be bonded to the people we love the most? A great deal of research has been done about the link between the level of bonding in relationships and our mental and physical health. In one study, University of California "analyzed data on 1500 middle class folks who were born around 1910 in California. the voluminous records traced their lives over eight decades until their deaths, detailing their experiences and habits through prosperity, the Great Depression, and two world wars. The notations included everything from the happiness of their parents' marriage to their career choice to the "number or books they had in their home. Physiologist Howard Friedman concluded that medical advances play a minor role in extending life span. Most people who live to old age do not do so because they have beaten cancer, heart disease, depression, or diabetes," he says. "Instead, <b>the long-lived avoid serious ailments altogether through a series of steps that rely on long-lasting, meaningful connections with others.</b> In other words, you can "eat special organic and gluten free foods, gulp down multivitamins, get yourself to the gym, and meditate into a stress-free zone, but the best tonic for staying healthy and happy into old age is probably toning up your relationship." Sue Johnson<br />
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Now that we understand that it is critical for us to have a bonded connection with the people we love the most, we need to understand how we get disconnected so we know how to get connected again. You see, <b>there is one common thing that happens in all relationships at some point. We mess up. </b>We say the wrong thing, or look at the person in the wrong way and as a result the other person reacts and distance comes between us. So what happens in those moments? As Dr. Johnson describes, a bonding (attachment) injury occurs. A bonding injury is basically when we intentionally or unintentionally do something that causes one partner to feel betrayed or abandoned and creates a feeling of panic in that person and feeling of emotional disconnection in the relationship. It is part of the human condition that this will happen with the people we love the most and the good news is that it is not permanent.<br />
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When a bonding injury happens, we have to understand that it creates a physical feeling that we are unsafe. Research has shown that when we a bonding injury happens in our relationships, it affects our brain in the same way as if we were being chased by a tiger. When there is a bonding injury in the relationship we emotionally feel unsafe and our brains responds as if we are in mortal danger. It is critical that we understand this because it is not a logical thing. When we are disconnected from those we love, we feel fear and panic that we will be left alone or that they do not have our back.<br />
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If we are to know what do to to heal a bonding injury and regain the closeness we once had or create the connection we desire, we first must understand how we respond when a bonding injury happens. There are three main ways that we deal with bonding injuries. We tend to gravitate towards one of these bonding styles.<br />
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We all have a bonding style that we naturally gravitate towards. Our style of bonding is created in childhood with the people we were closest to, such as our parents. If we had a parent that was unpredictable or uncertain we could have responded with an anxious bonding style by checking to know if they will be there & if they love us. Or we could have responded to the same situation by retreating by going to our bedroom when there was fighting to avoid conflict. The bonding style we developed as children are not good or bad. They simply were the ways that we coped with the people we most loved and how we maintained emotional safety. In fact, these styles are a form of resilience. <br />
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<b>Styles of Bonding</b><br />
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<b>Anxious</b> - looks for reassurance from their partner that the relationship is okay<br />
<b>Avoidant</b> - retreats from the danger by withdrawing or distancing themselves from the relationships<br />
<b>Securely attached</b> - feels safe and secure in the relationship and knows the other person has their back<br />
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The challenge happens when we continue to use our same default bonding style in our adult relationships with our partner. Let me give you an example. As a child I felt that I was sometimes unseen and unheard. I was an emotional child with parents who (although I love and respect very much) did not always know what to do with my emotions and would withdraw from me when I was “too emotional.” So I learned to deal with the situation using an anxious bonding style. I would protest their withdrawals with angry outbursts that were really asking “will you be there for me?” The challenge came in my marriage with Andy when I continued the same pattern of bonding with him. When he would withdraw from me, I would respond by reaching out in a protest or criticism and blame seeking a reaction by saying something like “what are you doing?” in a critical tone. What I really wanted to know was “are you there for me?” As you can imagine, reaching out to him in a critical way did not bring us closer together and did not get my needs met.<br />
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The good news is that although we gravitate towards one bonding style, we can change this pattern by creating new ways of interacting within our current relationships. <b>We can start out as being anxiously attached or avoidant but with a loving, connected partner we can change to become securely attached. </b>We might slip back to some of our old habits of bonding occasionally when crisis hits but that’s normal. The goal here is not to be perfect but it is rather to know there will be bonding injuries and to gain the skills and knowledge needed to build a securely attached relationship.<br />
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<b>Principles in Action </b><br />
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So how does this play out in real relationships? Let me tell you a story. I recall a time when I was upset about the loss of my grandmother. I was sitting on the floor crying and Andy walked into the room. He had his earphones in and he was on a mission to find something so he did not see my on the floor crying. He walked right past me. Even though I knew that he likely did not see me upset and I knew that he loves me very much and that if he did see me upset he would’ve stopped to comfort me, all this logic did not sink into how I felt. I was hurt. I started having thoughts about “why could he be so thoughtless and he doesn’t care about me”. Rather than tell him how I was feeling and ask him for what I needed, I criticized him. I walked into the kitchen and noticing he had not cleaned it like he said he would, I began an argument about the untidy kitchen. I was reaching out in an ineffective and confrontational way. In terms of bonding, I was anxiously attached and saying “if you loved me you would have cleaned the kitchen” even though what I really was feeling was “If you loved me you would hold me right now because I’m feeling sad.” As my protest was critical in nature, Andy reacted by becoming defensive and shutting down. A cool feeling came into our kitchen as he began to clean the kitchen angrily and became inaccessible by putting his ear phones in to listen to a book. He was dealing with the our disconnection by being avoidant and distancing himself from the conflict. I felt shut out. <br />
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A few minutes of anger and frustration passed until we both realized what we were doing. He stopped what he was doing, turned to me and with a softness in his voice said “I love you and I just want to be close to you.” I could feel the anger that was around my heart start to dissipate and I broke down crying saying “I’m just hurt. I was sad about my grandma and was in the other room crying when you walked right by me and didn’t notice me.” He looked at me concerned and responded “I didn’t see you there. I’m so sorry. What do you need? Do you want a hug?” With that invitation, I leaned towards him and melted in his arms. All the hurt and frustration melted away and we were bonded again.<br />
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<b>Digging Deep</b><br />
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Now that you understand bonding and what gets in the way of us feeling close with the people you love, how are these patterns affecting your life. One of the best ways you can take this information and apply it into your life is through exploration. If you desire more connection in your life, I encourage you to ask the following questions.<br />
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Which bonding style do you gravitate towards?<br />
How is the way you are reacting in your relationships impacting you?<br />
Do you want more out of the relationships in your life and to feel more connection and love?<br />
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Of all the things we can devote our time to learning about and improving, we need to make our relationship happiness our highest priority. After all, societies succeed and fail based on relationships. Families are healed and broken by relationships. Our hearts soar and shatter because of relationships. <b>Our connections with the people we love the most are the foundation of our happiness, our sense of security and love in this world. </b><br />
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So you are at a turning point right here and right now. Your destiny is in front of you. Will you fight for your relationships? Will you be willing to learn about your patterns in relationships and seek to change them to more loving patterns? Will you improve your relationships, heal past patterns that hurt the people you love, and create a future of love with the ones you hold most dear? <br />
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I promise you that as you do this, you will be lifted and guided. I know that relationships are not only important to you but important to our Creator. As you seek His guidance and take steps forward to improve your relationships, he will life and strengthen you and give you inspiration about what to do. As we work on and strengthen our relationships with the people closest to us, we not only strengthen our family but we strengthen future generations, our community, and the world. <br />
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I look forward to continuing this journey with you as next time we will dive into the specific steps we can take to become bonded even after feeling disconnected. I know that as we understand bonding and know what to do to be connected with the people we love the most, we can experience a joy that is beyond anything else in this life. <b>There is no safer place in the world that in the arms of the one who loves you most when you are securely bonded. </b>My goal is to help you get there.<br />
<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-53604595250525732592016-10-18T05:40:00.001-07:002016-10-18T05:40:03.326-07:00OVERCOMING PROCRASTINATION<br />
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If you are a living, breathing human being…which I can safely bet you are if you are reading this, then you sometimes procrastinate. It is something that we all do. In fact it is in our very nature to push anything unpleasant to the future. If it is in our very nature to do this, then what’s the big deal right? We’ll do it someday. Sounds like reasonable logic, however most often someday never comes. I have never seen a day in the week, month or year marked someday. As Marvin Ashton put it, "procrastination is an unwholesome blend of doubt and delay.” So guess the real question we need to ask ourselves so that we understand the impact of such delay is to take a look at what procrastination is exactly and what in fact we are delaying. <br />
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The oxford dictionary defines Procrastination as “The action of delaying or postponing something.” So what exactly are we delaying? We are putting off our goals and dreams for a later time that may never come. The things we want most in this life but are afraid of trying to achieve. So what do we lose when we procrastinate? We can run out of time, lose blessings that we would have had, lose opportunities and lose direction from our Creator. To illustrate how this works, let me tell you a story.<br />
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<b>Principles in Action</b><br />
I recall reading about a man, let’s call him Dan who struggled with addiction. He was an upstanding member of the community with a wife and children. As he gave into his addiction, he began to lose that which mattered most to him. His wife left him, he couldn’t visit with his children, he lost his job and eventually he became homeless. Now that is not the end of this man’s story. Eventually he realized all that he was losing in his life and turned it all around. He sought help for his addiction and went into recovery, obtained a job again and returned to actively being involved in his children’s lives and the community. <br />
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He was speaking one day in front of a group of youth and the person introducing asked the audience to look at the man I described above. They were asked if they could tell that the successful, contributing member of the community standing in front of them was once homeless and lost. The person introducing him went on to describe that because of the Creator and his hard work, the man standing in from of them was a changed person and that through these things he moved on from his mistakes to become the successful person he is today. Following the meeting, Dan pulled aside the person who introduced him in private. Dan spoke to him in a soft but stern voice. He said "I wish you would have told them one more thing". The man looked at Dan with a questioning look as Dan described “you told them that once I turned to my Creator and worked hard to get my life back, things worked out of me. However what you didn’t tell them is that no matter how hard I worked and how much I pleaded with my Creator, I could not get back the things I loved most which I had lost. You see, I turned my life around but my I still did not have my wife and children living with me. The Creator could not restore the blessings I could have had if I had turned my life around earlier.” <br />
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I tell you that story because it is true with all of us. When we procrastinate we lose blessings that we could have had. So if procrastination is such a dangerous thing, why on earth would we put ourselves through it? Well there is a mindset that goes a long with procrastination that lulls us into believing it is the best option. This mindset is empowered by a serious of thoughts that our logical mind can hold onto and justify delay. If we are not aware of this procrastination thinking, we will fall prey to it. So let’s look at what are the thoughts that empower procrastination. <br />
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<b>The thoughts that empower procrastination are:</b><br />
• It’s too hard<br />
• It’s too late<br />
• I have no need to...<br />
• The task appears impossible<br />
• I doubt my worthiness<br />
• I’ll wait for roadblocks to be removed<br />
• I’ll wait for the problem to go away<br />
• I don’t have enough…time, money, ability<br />
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As you read that list, did you notice any of the procrastination thinking that you listen to? How are they holding you back from your goals? <br />
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<b>Cycle to Creating Results</b><br />
So now that we really understand the impact of these thoughts, we need to understand how change occurs. Our thoughts not only impact our ability to create change in our lives, it is critical. There is Cycle to Creating Results that exists. If we are not aware of this cycle will will not understand how to create real change in our lives. We will run the risk of missing an essential step towards change and feel frustrated and confused as to why we are not able to effectively reach our goals. <br />
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<b>Desire </b>- How it works is that in order for us to change anything in our lives, we must first have a desire to change. For example, we are not going to run a marathon if we have no desire to go running!<br />
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<b>Thoughts</b> - Then our thoughts need to support the change we want to make. If we are constantly telling ourselves that we cannot do it, that will become true.<br />
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<b>Plan</b> - Next we need to plan how we are going to make the change we want. I remember one time I was training to run a half marathon and I thought I was right on track with my goals, until I looked at the distance I was actually running and compared it with the distance I would need to run to complete the race. They were two very different numbers and it took planning to reach my goal.<br />
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<b>Action</b> - The next step is to take action! We will not make change simply by thinking about it or planning it. This seems pretty basic but I can’t tell you how many entrepreneurs I have met over the course of my work as a trainer that have spend years just planning to start their business but not actually starting it!<br />
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<b>Be Valiant</b> - The next step is being valiant. That means when we fall down, or forget, or procrastinate (which we will at times), we just get back up and try again. <br />
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The most incredible thing about this cycle is that it aligns with the law of momentum. What I mean by that is that more we go through this cycle on a particular goal we have, the more momentum we have towards reaching that goal. Our desires increased as we take action, we realize that we actually can do it and it becomes easier for us to do it!<br />
<b><br />Straightway to Action</b><br />
So in order for us to avoid the destruction that is caused by procrastination and move towards the goals and dreams we have, we must take straightway action. Marvin Ashton defines straightway as “straightway is an action word, it means immediately, without delay or hesitation." There is a 5 step process that I have found that is bullet proof when taking straightway action. It is one that will help to move us forward predictably even when the task at hand is one that we are afraid of, don’t want to do or just feel like we don’t have enough resources for. If we follow these steps we will be able to move closer towards what we want to accomplish.<br />
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<b>5 Steps to Straightway Action</b><br />
1. <b>Alignment</b> - We need to be following the true principles of our Creator that we know about. This allows us to receive spiritual help in our endeavors. For example if we know that we need to thank the Creator everyday, we better be doing that!<br />
2. <b>Self Discipline</b> - Do the small, consistent, daily tasks necessary to accomplish your goal<br />
3. Accept Responsibility - Know that it is your responsibility to accomplish what you desire in this life and take the steps necessary to do it!<br />
4. <b>Faith</b> - Ask the Creator for help in accomplishing your task & have trust that He can help you<br />
5. <b>Be Valiant</b> - Be willing to get back up and try again<br />
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When we take straightway action and take small, consistent steps towards our goals we receive a great deal of blessings from the Creator. We are given an added measure of strength, courage, wisdom, help from above, joy and the ability to create lasting and meaningful change. Will will be able to achieve things that we didn’t know were possible as we are lifted and strengthened by our Creator. <br />
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<b>Principles in Action</b><br />
One time I received a tax form that I needed to fill out. I really don’t like filling out tax forms. I don’t know what it is about tax forms but they kind of freak me out. I worry that I will fill them out wrong or that I will need a ton of information to dig up that I either don’t have or don’t know where to find and so I procrastinate filling it out. I put off filling out this form for months. I even printed it out several times and after carefully shuffling it from place to place to avoid actually completing it, I lost it and needed to reprint it. <br />
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Finally the deadline for completing the form was upon me and so I grabbed the paper and reluctantly began filling in the blanks of the form. I picked a time to work on the form everyday until I was completed and followed through on working on it every day. I was surprised to find that once I actually put pen to paper I filled out the form in 5 minutes. That’s right, I sheepishly admit that it literally took me 5 minutes to fill out the form after months of procrastination. <br />
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<b>Digging Deep</b><br />
Where are you procrastinating in your own life? We all have a decision to make when it comes to taking action on the things we want to accomplish in this life. Time will pass in our lives whether we take action on our dreams or not. I remember when Andy was contemplating completing his Masters Degree and although he could have easily procrastinated on this and said he will do it on a “someday” that will never come or he could do it now. He taught me a true principle about procrastination when he said to me “4 years are going to pass whether I work on my masters degree or not”.<br />
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So what do you want to accomplish in this life?<br />
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What are you willing to do to accomplish it?<br />
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Will you let the minutia of life get in the way of your dreams or will you fight everyday for what you most want?<br />
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Will you do the disciplined, difficult daily decisions to achieve your dreams? Will you follow through when it’s raining, when you feel like crap, when you just don’t want to?<br />
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Will you be valiant? Will you get back up and try again when you don’t have enough…time, money, patience, faith.<br />
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Will your life pass before your eyes and allow your dreams to go with it or will you be a warrior and fight for your dreams? <br />
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I promise that if you make the decision now to begin to take straightway action towards your goals, you will receive help from above. You will be lifted, strengthened, inspired about the next step to take. You have been put at this place, in this life for a reason. The Creator is aware of you and wants to help you achieve your full potential. You have important to do in this life. Take a step in the direction towards worthy goals and you will be able to achieve more than you thought possible. Take a step towards your potential, your goals and your dreams. <br />
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The decision is yours and only yours to make. <b>The time is right now, today, straightway.</b>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-81441389588704834802016-09-23T05:45:00.002-07:002016-09-23T05:46:13.631-07:00LESSONS FROM GRANDMA<br />
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My grandmother Millie Massie passed away recently and I had the opportunity to be with her during the last few weeks of her life before she moved on from this life. I have reflected on my grandmother's life and the lessons she has taught me through the way she lived. Today I would like to honour her by sharing those lessons with you.<br />
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In the process of seeking for lessons in my grandmother's life, I had the opportunity to interview some of the people who loved her most. These conversations <span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 14px;">helped the story of her life unfold just a little more. There was a pattern that emerged, a set of <b>5 key principles of how to live a joyful life </b>that she embodied and taught me through the way she lived. I will share these principles today.</span><br />
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Before we explore the principles my Grandma taught me, I would like to share who my grandmother is. I say "is" because although her physical body is no longer with me, her spirit very much is. When I asked people to describe my grandma in 2 words, I was surprised to find that many people used similar words to describe her. So who is Millie Massie? She is gentle, a good friend, fun, big hearted, caring, strong, full of life, generous, strong willed, competitive, family oriented, honest, patient and selfless. </span></span><br />
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These are the qualities that empowered her to teach us the 5 key principles through the way she lived. These principles have helped to shape me into who I am today. What are the key principles that my grandmother taught and lived? Lets begin with a story. </span></span><br />
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<b style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 14px;">
Love One Another </b><br />
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I remember walking up the front walkway to my grandma’s house, ringing the doorbell and seeing her beautiful face coming towards me through the window on the porch door. She opened the door and with arms open wide gave me the biggest hug and began to pick up and cuddle my children who scampered into her home. She had a tea party all set up for us because somehow no matter the time of day, there was always a plate of cakes and cookies on a lace table cloth and the smell of freshly brewed tea filled the air. We had barely entered her dining room when she slipped off to a side bedroom and returned with a bag full of children’s kitchen toys. My children quickly emptied the bag onto the floor and soon were bringing us culinary creations as grandma happily played along. There was always however one intruder in our picnic fun. You see this bag of children’s toys was composed of 99% kitchen toys and 1% pretend cockroach. Those odds sound pretty good however it came with a catch. You see, we never knew where that pretend cockroach was or where he would end up. We started to call him Bob the bug and Bob had a propensity for showing up in the most unusual places. Places like Grandma’s tea cup. There was more than a few times when poor grandma had a bit of a jump when Bob took her by surprise. We would all laugh at the game and my daughter Zoe would stay busy searching for the next place to hide Bob.</span></span><br />
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Why do I tell you that story? I tell you this story because <b>grandma</b></span></span><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 14px;"> had a way of making whoever she was with feel specia</b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue";"><span style="font-size: 14px;">l. She was fun to be around and her home was a welcome place with laughter and stories and always delicious treats. </span></span><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 14px;">The first principle my grandmother taught me was to love one another</b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue";"><span style="font-size: 14px;">. She lived this principle in everything she did. </span></span><br />
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In my family as in all families there has been contentions that has surfaced over the years. Whenever I would visit my grandma her reaction to these family tiffs were always the same. She would say “family is family.” That is how she was. She was the one who would attend the wedding of the estranged family member and call the family member that no one else was talking to. </span></span><b style="-webkit-text-stroke-color: rgb(0, 0, 0); font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 14px;">She patiently waited for people and unconditionally loved them. </b>
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The second principle my grandmother taught was to be generous. She was generous in time, money, and spirit. Millie was the kind of person who always was collecting something to help someone. She was the family depot to drop off clothes, pop can tabs, soup labels and toilet paper rolls because she knew of someone who could use them. Grandma was constantly donating baking for bake sales and she volunteered countless hours at the Cross Cancer Clinic and the Veterans Home. </span></span><br />
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My grandma spent her time looking for ways to make the world around her better for the people she knew and those she didn’t.</b><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue";"><span style="font-size: 14px;"> </span></span><br />
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The third principle Millie taught is to live life fully. </b>If Millie wanted something she would make it happen. She travelled the world from Hawaii to Paris and everywhere in between. As a young girl I was inspired by her courage to travel by herself and so I set my sights on journeys of my own. </span></span><br />
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Grandma lived life full on. This is a story that reveals just how full of life my grandmother was. You see, her niece Wendy had invited a nice chap to be her date at Joyce’s wedding. During the butterfly song, Wendy passed her unsuspecting date to my grandmother. He linked arms with Grandma and as she began to spin him around he could not have known what was about to happen. You see, my grandmother is a slight woman and just by looking at her, one cannot accurately assess the shear power that is within her. As she spun this unsuspecting young man around and then released him, she sent this poor boy flying across the dance floor. He ended up sliding across the floor on his bottom. They all laughed and continued the dance and I'm willing to bet that the poor boy found a new dance partner!</span></span><br />
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Faith</b></span></span><br />
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The fourth principle Millie taught us was to have faith. </b>My grandma knew God and loved him. She knew there was something waiting for her beyond this life. I know that too. I know that my grandmother is no longer in pain. I know that God is real and that he loves her and us. I know that she is with him now and that she is happy. My grandma talked about her faith and what she believed happens when we die. The faith she had strengthened her throughout her life. I recall seeing my grandma weeks before she passed away. Her body was weak from the sickness she was fighting but her spirit was strong. I laid on the bed beside her and looked into her beautiful blue eyes. She reached out and touched my face. <b>I could tell by the look in her eyes that she knew she was about to pass through the veil soon.</b> I asked her if she was scared and she replied “no. If it must be then it must be.” She had a peaceful look across her face and I kissed her forehead. She had a determination and strength that pulsed within her and kept her going even when it defied medical explanation. She was surrounded by many of the people she loved right until it was time for her to pass away from this life and move onto the next part of her journey. </span></span><br />
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Perseverance </b></span></span><br />
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The fifth principle that Millie lived was perseverance</b>. Millie did not have an easy life but she made the best of it and found joy and love within the best and worst moments. She lost many people she loved over the years. She found love three times but unfortunately they all passed away. I can’t even imagine how difficult it must have been for her to lose her companions. Millie also lost her daughter Jeannette and son Jim. These losses were devastating to her. Yet somehow she managed to leave her heart open to continue to be loving and find joy in her life. Russell M Nelson said that “<b>mourning is the deepest expression of pure love, The only way to take sorrow out of death is to take love out of life.</b>” My grandma lived this principle.</span></span><br />
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The lessons that Millie taught through her lived life was to (1) Love one another, (2) Be generous, (3) To live life fully, (4) To have faith, and (5) To persevere. </b> My grandma epitomized these principle.</span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica neue";"><span style="font-size: 14px;">In this life each of us will lose people that we love. I've pondered <b>how can we grieve peacefully when we long for more time with the people we love, how can we leave our hearts still open to loving, laughing, and honouring their life and the lessons they taught us? </b>I believe that the path to do this is through remembering them and the lessons they taught us by living those principles. I know that as I continue to honour my grandmothers legacy by loving one another; by being generous with my time, talents and resources; by living fully; by having faith; and by persevering her spirit is carried forward through my life.</span></span><br />
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When we truly look at the impact of the people we love, we see the law of compounding in action. Their example of how they live their life teaches us how we can live ours and all the people whose lives they have ever touched during their time in this world. </span>My grandmother's example has shown me how to love more, live more and serve more. </span></span><br />
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In the last days that my grandmother was with me I asked her what her best advice is. My grandma thought for a moment and then gently said “be true to yourself and take care of your family.” I will take your advice Grandma and will live the principles that you taught and lived. Until we meet again, know that I love you, I will remember you and that you touched my heart with your life.</span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-53647188596292443492016-09-09T05:38:00.001-07:002016-11-08T15:56:41.992-08:00SELF DOUBT<br />
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<span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><b><span style="font-size: 18px;">Self Doubt</span></b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;"><b>There is something that lies in wait within us that when we allow it to run free, it can tear down our ability to reach our goals.</b> It is so insidious that we barely see it in our lives and yet the effects of it on us can be so great. The difficult thing about it is that no one else can tangibly see it, a doctor cannot remove it, and we cannot look in the mirror and with surety say “there it is”. Yet it is within all of us at some time or another. What am I talking about? I am referring to self doubt. The belief in ourselves and what we can accomplish is one of the most basic and yet critical components to what we are actually able to achieve. However, it is in our very nature to have self doubt. Everyone in this entire world has it to some degree or another. Although it is in our nature to have it, we also have the ability to overcome it. <b>That is what we will talk about today, the 4 steps to overcoming self doubt so that we can be set free to work towards achieving what we desire. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">To understand self doubt we need to understand how exactly it stops us. <b>There is a challenge to overcoming self doubt and if we don’t know it exists, that not only stops us from overcoming it but makes it so we don’t even know it is there.</b> This is the challenge of the self doubt wall. You see when we allow self doubt to enter our mind by entertaining the self doubt thoughts and allowing them to stay, it is as though a wall begins to form in front of us. All the negative thoughts about ourselves like “I can’t do this”, “I’m stupid”, “how could I have screwed up again” accumulate and block our ability to move forward. <b>They keep us stuck in the dangerous place of inaction.</b> When we understand this though we can move forward even thought these negative thoughts that accumulate into a self doubt wall are before us. There is something we can do to overcome the wall of self doubt. This thing will allow us to leap over the wall towards our goals. We can use something called rigor to overcome our self doubt. To be able to use rigor we must first understand what it is. Rigor is the ability to do something even though it is difficult. It is the will within us to move forward even though we don’t want to, we don’t know how, we can’t see how it will work out. It is our willingness to try anyways. In this life rigor is required to jump over the walls of our own self doubt. When we are in action we do not have time to ask if we can do it or not. You see, as <a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php">Brandon Broadwate</a><a href="https://www.blogger.com/null">r</a> says “people will take you as seriously as you take yourself.” <b>How seriously we take ourselves lies within our ability to see over our self doubt to our full potential and our willingness to reach for that potential even when we are not sure how. </b></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">There are times in this journey however when we will be met with uncertainty. We may at times try and fail. We may feel discouraged about our efforts that are not working as quickly as we want them to. We may feel alone in our trying to succeed. We may feel like it’s not worth the effort. In those moments we must understand something. We must understand this principle because that discouragement that we feel can either drag us down to the depths of inactivity or despair or move us forward. It can steal our dreams or empower us to light a force within us that is so great that it can overcome anything put in our path. To underhand this principle I will share with you a quote by Neil A. Maxwell. He said<b> “discouragement is not the absence of adequacy but the absence of courage.”</b> So lets not allow the absence of courage to enter our lives and our dreams. Let’s not delay finding the courage within us to powerfully move forward and take the next step towards what we desire to achieve. There is courage that lies within you. More courage and ability that you can possibly imagine. It is waiting. It is waiting to be set free in the small consistent actions that you will take towards what you desire. So take a step. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">I promised at the beginning of this discussion of self doubt to share with your the 4 steps to overcoming self doubt. I am a woman of my word. The four steps to overcoming self doubt when you follow them will allow you to overcome discouragement and the wall of self doubt. It will light the courage that lies within you and help you to find the rigor you need to succeed. It will allow your creator to work with you and help you along your path. So here they are:</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">4 Steps to Overcoming Self Doubt</span></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Alignment to Higher Law Principles</span></span></li>
<li style="font-family: 'helvetica neue'; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">Manage your state of mind</span></span></li>
<li style="font-family: 'helvetica neue'; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">Serve those around you</span></span></li>
<li style="font-family: 'helvetica neue'; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">Stay in growth </span></span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">Now that we know what the 4 Steps to Overcoming Self Doubt are let’s pull them apart a little so we can truly underhand them. Alignment to Higher Laws really means following the Higher Law Principles you know are true. So for example if you know that it is a true principle to start your day by talking to your Creator and saying thank you, alignment means that you do it. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">Manage your state of mind means doing what it takes to not entertain negative thoughts about yourself that leads to self doubt. An example of this might be that when you notice a negative thought, don’t beat yourself up about it, just ask a question that helps you feel good. An example of this might be “what do I do well?” or “what am I grateful for?” <b>Shifting our focus allows us to shift our thoughts, feelings and actions.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">Serving those around us is critical to overcoming self doubt because when we are in the service of others, we get a breather from our own problems. <b>We don’t have time for self doubt when we are engaged in the act of lifting another.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">Staying in growth means allowing yourself to try and sometimes fail. Making it okay for your to learn lessons and discover what you can do even when you are not sure how to do it at first. It is only through trial and error that we can grow. Give yourself space to fall down. Just get back up, brush yourself off and know that you are in the incredible act of becoming more. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">Principles in action</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">I once took on the task of organizing an event that I had never done before. I was flying in an international speaker and had two other well known speakers to an event that I was the sole organizer for. The only issue was that I had no idea how to do it. I had never organized an event like that before. I was a stay at home mom most of the time and was working part time in my </span></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">business. In the space between dropping off my daughter at preschool and picking her up again less that 2 hours later was my only time to work on this daunting project. I recall thinking so many times “I can’t do this” and “what if no one comes.” <b>Sometimes the hardest thing I would accomplish in my tiny blocks of work was to overcome these thoughts of self doubt.</b> To make matters worse, I was having a really hard time accomplishing the task. <b>About two weeks before the event I had a grand total of 14 people registered for my auditorium sized room. I was panicked.</b> How would I possibly be able to pull off this event when I was already proving that I couldn’t do it? My self doubt became louder. I eventually got to a point of no return. A point when I realized that I couldn’t do it on my own but that maybe the Creator knew how I could do it and could help me. <b>I began to use the 4 steps to overcoming self doubt that I leaned at the <a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php">Master Your Power Within</a> event and things began to shift.</b> How did I use these steps? I made sure that before I called anyone I talked to my Creator first and gave up my self doubt, insecurity and fears. I managed my state by getting up out of my chair and doing my move (something I learned at the Master Your Power Within event to drastically change my state of mind). I focused on how I could truly serve the person I was talking to and asked the Creator for help to do so. I stayed in growth by being willing to fail and fall down and realizing that although it was not comfortable, it is an important part of growth. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;"><b>Doing these 4 steps changed everything and allowed me to go from having 12 people registered for the event to a place where the event was completely packed within a 2 week period.</b> What changed? I changed. Even though I didn’t know how to do it, even though I was scared and unsure, even though I had self doubts I did it anyways. I took the next step, did the next right thing, got up when I fell flat on my face. Y<b>ou see we cannot be paralyzed by the walls of doubt when we are busy in action. Momentum disempowers self doubt. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">Let’s Make Sure We’ve Got it</span></div>
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<li style="font-family: 'helvetica neue'; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">Self doubt can stop us from getting started towards our goals</span></span></li>
<li style="font-family: 'helvetica neue'; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">When we entertain self doubt it acts like a barrier in front of us</span></span></li>
<li style="font-family: 'helvetica neue'; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">We can use rigor to overcome self doubt by taking action even when we don’t know how it will work out</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica neue"; font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">4 Steps to Overcoming Self Doubt</span></span><ol>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Alignment to Higher Law Principles</span></span></li>
<li style="font-family: 'helvetica neue'; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">Manage your state of mind</span></span></li>
<li style="font-family: 'helvetica neue'; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">Serve those around you</span></span></li>
<li style="font-family: 'helvetica neue'; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">Stay in growth </span></span></li>
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<span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">Digging Deep</span></span></div>
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Now that we have uncovered some of the truths about self doubt, you have a decision to make, will you apply what you know unto yourself? Will you take a look within yourself to find the areas of self doubt that are blocking you from reaching your full potential? What if the very thing you don’t feel like you can do is the very thing that the Creator is waiting for you do to, needs you to do? Will you put off your destiny for later or will you move forward courageously right now? You can start by asking yourself the following questions.
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<li>what is one thing you feel like you need to do but worry that you might fail at?<ol>
<li>Alignment to Higher Law Principles - ask the Creator for help daily with the task you want to do</li>
<li>Manage your state of mind - set a time everyday to work on the task you want to do and before you start the task get up and move your body (walk outside, deep breath, do jumping jacks, anything to get you moving)</li>
<li>Serve those around you - ask the Creator “who can I serve today” and take action to help that person (helping those around you cheerfully will give you increased capacity and energy)</li>
<li>Stay in growth - when you fail, just get back up and try again fast</li>
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I know you are reading this for a reason. There is something that you have been inspired to do or a goal that you desire. It is waiting <span style="background-color: white;">for you and the increased capacity and potential that it will bring to your life. Don’t delay for an unknown someday. There is no day on the calendar marked someday. <b>The time is now, today, straightway without delay. This is your moment so take it. </b></span>
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<span style="background-color: white;">Connie</span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-47786366333020914632016-09-02T05:38:00.000-07:002016-09-02T05:38:19.567-07:00<div>
<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: medium;"><b>5 Steps to Spiritual Knowledge</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">As we talked about earlier, we are often told a great deal of myths about who we are and our purpose in this life. <b>We can become lost in a guilt ridden perfectionist vision of who we should be.</b> Such things can leave us feeling not enough, guilty and can most dangerously prevent us from seeing our true potential and divine nature. In this world of immense pressure, it is of great importance that we know who we are, where we came from and where we are going. To not understand these things will cause us to be lost in worldly expectations and the trivial matters. To understand them empowers us and frees us to take the critical and small steps towards personal and spiritual mastery in this life. </span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">Pam’s story</span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">In my work as a Master Coach, I have the privilege of talking with women from around the world about this subject in many different forms. It’s curious to me how many women struggle with this. One young lady I worked with, lets call her Pam wanted to do many things in this life but she felt trapped. She was well educated and a successful real estate investor however she wanted more. She had been tricked into thinking that her that her biology was her destiny. You see, Pam had a developmental disability that made it difficult for her to walk so she walked with a severe limp. Her disability began to become her identity and although she had accomplished some great things in this life, she could not see her full potential. She did not believe that she was capable of being loved in an intimate relationship and felt left alone by her Creator. This belief about her potential is something that not only Pam faced but we all face in this life. <b>We all bump up against the ceilings of what we believe we are capable and we think that those ceilings are real and that there is nothing we can do about them.</b> They appear real and when we believe them, they become real. <b>With our beliefs we form our destiny. </b>For Pam she was trapped with her beliefs about her potential and these beliefs were causing her to miss out on everything that she wanted in this life. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">I remember one distinct moment when I began to see the blocks to who Pam believed she was begin to fall away to create space for a bigger more divine version of herself. We were talking after she had attended a Master Your Power Within Event and she was telling me about her fears and her beliefs about who she is. I looked at her for a moment and although she was describing who she thought she was I saw her in a completely different light. I could see the strength within her for having powerfully navigating this world with a condition that made it more difficult for her to get around, a saw the kindness and love within her by how much she cared for other people and was willing to help her, and I saw her potential that she was capable of doing whatever she wanted in this life. I asked her “is it possible that you are more that you think you are.” She looked up at me and I could see a glimmer of hope entering her eyes as she responded “what do you mean?” I answered “what if your limitations do not define you? What if there really is a loving Creator who knows and loves you? What if you have a divine destiny that is beyond what you can imagine? What if you can be loved deeply? What would it mean for you if these things could be true?” She looked up at me with tears forming in the corners of her eyes and for the first time I could see the beginnings of understanding of who she really is. She asked me “how can I know if these things are true?” I turned towards her to face her squarely and asked “Don’t you already know the answer to that question?” She paused for a moment and remember the things she learned at <a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php">Master Your Power Within event</a> said “Yes I know what I need to do to know for myself.” You see Pam knew that she could receive her own answers about her potential by going to her Creator and asking and she knew how to get an answer. <b>She knew the 5 steps to gaining spiritual knowledge. Now she was truly set free. </b>She could begin the process of redefining who she is and what she is capable in the most powerful way, through the eyes of her Creator. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">So what did Pam need to understand to begin to see her full potential? She needed to understand that her capacity is not defined by her physical body, that she has a divine potential and that her <b>past</b></span> <b><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">is not your future, your biography is not your </span></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">destiny. </span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">My father died when I was 16 years old and his death left me feeling lost, confused, and angry. At that point in my life I did not have a relationship with the Creator and I thought if there really is a God, why would he take my dad? I felt angry and alone for many years. Until I learned some key principles that helped me begin to ask questions that brought me to understand the character of the Creator and his love for me.</span> <span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">The lack of knowledge of these key principles for most of my life left me feeling lost and adrift, especially when tough times hit…which inevitably they always do in this life. Once I understood them I felt empowered and excited about my potential. </span><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">These key principles have been condensed into a powerful and easy process called the</span> <span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;"><b>5 Steps to spiritual knowledge. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">Just because you have been the person you are up until this point in your life does not mean this is where you need to stay. <b>What if you could let go of some of the beliefs and ideas that are holding you back from living your full potential?</b> What if there is a part within you that is capable of much more than you can even comprehend? What if there is a loving Creator just waiting for you to turn to him to strengthen you and lift you up in all your are facing in this life…the difficult times, the joy and the uncertainty? What if the things you want in this life most of all are possible for you to achieve if you take a step forward in trust and are willing to learn and apply what you learn? What if there really is more beyond this life and a purpose to it all?</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">What if those things are true? How would it change you? I know that all these things are true. I know that because I have seen them in my own life and in the lives of the incredible people around me. <b>I know because I have learned how to ask the Creator if they are true and understand how to receive an answer.</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">I believe that you are reading this for a reason and that you are being called to live up to even more of your potential. So strap in, hold on tight because life truly is never going to be the same. </span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">There is a Creator of this world and He created each of us. Each one of us is one of his spirit children and he looks out for us and helps us as we ask and are willing to receive his help. He knows what is going on for us at all times and is mindful of us. He is a loving parent. Just as a loving parent would not swoop in and fix everything for their children, so too the creator cannot just fix everything for us. He brought us here so we could learn, grow, progress and increase our capacity to love and be more like him. He gave us the most incredible gift he could have possibly given us and that gift is the gift of agency. Agency means that he respects our ability to choose between right and wrong, between what is good for us and what is not. He loves us so much that he is willing to allow us to choose our destiny and level of happiness. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">Wow agency sounds like an awesome gift doesn’t it? I thought so too at first. It really is the best gift anyone could give but it does not come without a cost. What am I talking about? I don’t know about you but sometimes I don’t always make the best decisions. Each choice we make either brings us closer to our Creator or further away from him and from our divine potential. In order for us to make choices that bring us closer to him we need to educate our desires. What I mean is that we need to understand what our Creator desires for us and also understand what desires we have that will empower our divine potential. How do we do that? Through questions. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">If there really is a loving Creator and if he really is mindful and aware of you right now and everything you are going through, your hopes, your worries, your joys and frustrations? Is it possible that he can see the bigger picture of your life in the moments when you feel lost in the day to day minutia or trapped in the overwhelming circumstances of this life? If these things are true <b>how could we possibly tap into the wisdom of our Creator and receive direct inspiration about what we need to do in our life at this very moment to have more peace and feel more joy?</b> What if we start by asking the Creator? Sounds simple right? Sounds a little too easy? Well it is…and it isn’t all at the same time. Sometimes the most difficult thing we can do is humble ourself enough to recognize that we don’t know it all and that we need help. <b>Sometimes the farthest distance we can travel is to our knees in prayer.</b> When we go to our Creator in humility and believe we will receive an answer, something incredible happens. We receive answers in the Creator’s time and that seed of belief grows into a knowing. We often don’t start out believing but even a small desire to believe is enough to start.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">At the start of this discussion I told you that I would share with you the 5 keys to building belief I know that some of these steps might sound like something you have heard before and you could be tempted to blow them off as trite but I promise you they are not. If you choose to take them into your heart and give them a chance to work within you, I promise your understanding of who you are and your relationship with the divine will grow and you will begin to unlock the ultimate potential that lies within you.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">These 5 steps to spiritual knowledge are:</span></b></div>
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<li><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">desire to </span></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;">believe & b</span></span><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">e humble</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">believe that you will receive an answer about if he really exists or if he loves you</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">Ask your Creator yes or no questions </span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">Pay attention to how you feel - a sense of peace is the Creator</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;">’</span></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">s way of saying yes to you</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">Be patient and grateful when you receive answers</span></span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">In the future I will go into the specifics of how the Creator answers our questions but for now you just need to know that he will and that your answers may come in the form of a word, a thought or a feeling. Pay </span><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;">particular</span></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;"> attention to how you feel. If you ask a yes or no question to the Creator and following asking your question you feel a sense of peace, that is how the Creator answers yes to you. For now that is enough for you to get powerful answers about who you are.</span></div>
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<span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">Principles in Action</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">As I mentioned when I was 16 years old I was devastated by the death of my father. I could not understand how a loving God would take my dad and so I got angry…real angry. I wanted nothing to do with God or religion. Then I went to a course called <a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php">Master Your Power Within</a> that began to open my mind to the possibility of there being something bigger going on in the universe and the possibility that there is a Creator that is aware of me. I wanted to believe this was true but my heart was still very hurt so I was wary to allow myself to believe. Then one day I needed to know. I went into the woods in the shady evergreen forest of the Rocky Mountains in Canada and began walking on a snowy path towards an answer to a question that would change my life forever. I recall talking in my mind to the Creator (if there was one) and saying that I was angry about my dad and that I couldn’t understand why that would happen to me. Then as my heart softened I asked a life altering question using the 5 steps to spiritual knowledge. I asked if there really is a Creator. The moment I asked it my heart and stomach were filled with a feeling of peace and I knew that was the way the Creator was answering “yes, I am here.” That day and that question has stayed with me as one of my fundamental and treasured things that I know. I can now with sure confidence say that I know there is a Creator who is aware of and loves me. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">You may know that already but for me is was a game changer. Wherever you are at in your understanding of the Creator and yourself, I know that there is always room to learn and to understand more. After all, as Brandon Broadwater says “if we are not growing, we are dying.” So what questions do you have in your mind about who you are, your purpose in this life, or who the Creator is? <b>What if you could find the answers you are looking for and that the answers to life’s greatest mysteries are just a question away?</b> If you have a desire to learn and a willingness to wait for your answer and a humility in your heart, you will receive the answers you desire. I encourage you to ponder the following questions so you understand how gaining greater knowledge of the divine will help you right now in your life. </span></div>
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<li><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">What would it mean for you if you could have answers to the questions that are in your heart about your </span></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">purpose in this life?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">What is a question that you have that you could ask the Creator?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">How would knowing the answer to this question empower you?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">What if these things are true and you don’t take action on them?</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">Let</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;">’</span></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">s Make Sure We’ve Got it</span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">There is a loving Creator who is aware of you and what is happening in your life right now</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">When we understand who the Creator really is, we understand who we are and our divine potential</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">We are spirit children of our Creator </span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">We can receive answers to our questions by following the 5 steps to spiritual </span></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;"><span style="line-height: 17px;">knowledge </span></span></li>
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<li><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">desire to </span></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;">believe </span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">Be humble</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">Ask yes or no questions to know there really is a Creator</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">Pay attention to how you feel - a sense of peace is the Creator</span><span style="font-family: Helvetica;"><span style="font-size: 11.832807540893555px;">’</span></span><span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">s way of saying yes to you</span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">Be patient and grateful when you receive answers</span></span></li>
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<span style="font-family: Helvetica; font-size: x-small;">I know that as your seek to understand who you are and your potential in this life you will be empowered beyond what you can possibly imagine. I believe you are reading this for a reason and that there is a message your Creator is trying to give to you. Are your ears open to this message or are they shut in doubt and disbelief. <b>Will you choose to ask the questions that you have to gain even more of an understanding of your purpose in this life or will this message you have received today get lost in the shadows of busyness? </b>You have a choice to make now. You can take action and seek a deeper relationship with your Creator now or you can dismiss this message as an interesting little article. What will you do? I promise that if you take this message in with faith and take action on it, you will receive the answers you are looking for. You will feel empowered with growing closer to a loving <span style="background-color: white;">Creator and you will be more clear on your divine path in this life. I know these things are true and I am excited for you to discover them for yourself. </span></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-37930482308927719192016-04-27T06:29:00.002-07:002016-04-27T06:29:48.321-07:00UNDERSTANDING WHO YOU ARE<br />
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">When I first began to learn about Higher Laws it made me question all that I thought I knew. If Higher Laws were real, which as I tried them out I came to know that they are, that must mean something bigger is going on in this life. If something bigger is going on in this life, that must mean someone has a plan for us. Quite possibly even a plan for me. <b>As I wrestled with this idea I came face to face with years of believing this life is nothing more than the right now and that there is nothing really special about me.</b> It made me question what I thought I knew about who I am. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">In this life we can be told so many things about who we are. We get these messages from all around us, our parents, our friends, the people who don’t like us, the people we do like, the media. There is a constant barrage about what everyone else thinks we are and who we ‘should’ be. As teenagers we wrestle with the complexity of the battle within trying to match up our independence with the expectations of others. Although this battle is still alive and well within us as grown ups, it often goes under the radar. We try to ignore the criticism of our spouse or the negative comment of another parent from school but really they eat away at us just a little bit. <b>As women we are given so many messages about who we need to be</b>. We are told that we need to be smart but not nerdy smart, sexy but not sleazy, fun but not irresponsible. We feel we need to be superwoman…our clothes not only perfectly matching but also clean (if you have little babies you know how hard this one can be), our house spotless, the perfectly manicured lawn with an abundant flower and vegetable garden, our hair combed and perfect by the time we walk out the door and our makeup done to face the day. We are told we need to the the perfect wife, never nagging our husbands, the perfect mother, never being frustrated with our kids and always being the model of love and patience. We are told that we need to have it all figured out…our finances in order, our kids in every activity they can possibly do, be experts at cooking, cleaning, and even sex. <b>The pressure of all the shoulds “shoulding” all over us is a weight that can drag us down into despair and a feeling of being not good enough</b>. But what if all those expectations that we and others put on us are not true? What if they are not only not necessary but are the very things that would prevent us from being who we truly are and becoming who we are meant be? What if we don’t have to be perfect? What if we just need to be perfectly striving towards improvement and our potential? What if we have a divine heritage, purpose and destiny? </span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Myths of who we believe we are </span></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">I once spoke to a woman I admire who has been in this earth for much longer than I have and she shared one regret that she had in this life. One thing that if she knew when she was younger it would have saved her a great deal of heartache. When she told me I thought "wow that's so true!!” She told me that her one regret is that she noticed that wherever she was at in life she cheated herself into believing she was not enough...not skinny enough, not brave enough, not pretty enough. However when she had the benefit of looking back through the wise lenses of time, she saw that in fact she was enough.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">This is so true isn’t it? I recall thinking to myself as a teenager "I'm so fat!" And yet as I look back at pictures during that time I was quite slim. In fact I was more slim than I have been since then and likely ever will be again. So why is it that we can rob ourselves of the joy within the now? What if right now at this very moment we are enough? What if the trials, struggles and experiences we are going through at this junction in time are exactly what we need to learn the lessons we need to learn? What if these lessons and who we are now are what is required to become who we truly are meant to be? What if we are enough...smart enough, pretty enough, skinny enough, brave enough? What if when we accept that we are enough that allows the door to opportunity to open and reveal our ultimate potential and allows us to strive to be even better with a full acceptance and love for who we are now? </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">I remember when I was in sixth grade and puberty hit with all the changes in my body and emotions that come along with it. I was awkward and insecure and searching for acceptance outside myself. Unfortunately a bully in my class noticed this and picked up on the one thing about my body that I was most self conscious of and of course he pointed it out…not just to me but to anyone within earshot. I was mortified. Not only was I a girl, but I was a young girl in puberty who was insecure and searching to understand and find acceptance about who I was. I began to take on the unkind words of the bully and soon when I looked into the mirror, all I could see was that one insecurity staring back at me. I couldn’t see anything else and I began to take on the identity of someone who is ugly. I secretly used every technique I could to physically change my appearance in hopes that would help me to feel loved and accepted.</span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Many years later as an adult I was talking with a friend of mine who casually talked about having the same issue that I had experienced as a teen. However, there was something different about the way she talked about it. For her it was just a normal part of growing up and becoming a woman and was no big deal. I looked at her with disbelief that she would talk about what I had previously thought was such a shameful thing. Then the realization hit me that it was not just me that was dealing with that body change, that this was a pretty common issue many women faced but just didn’t talk about. I realized that it didn’t define who I am and that I could be beautiful even though I was not perfect and that the haunting teasings of bullies in the past did not have to stay with me. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Why do I tell you that story? I tell it to you because we all have skeletons on our closet about who we have been told we are. Maybe it is an unkind teacher, a parent who said an unkind thing in anger about us, a sister or brother who lashed out at us or a bully at school. Maybe it was a feeling of unworthiness from the barrage of media images about who we are supposed to be. However those beliefs about who we are came to be, I want you to know that you no longer need to believe them. That they are not true. That you are so much more. That you have a divine destiny and purpose that is greater than what you can possibly imagine. You get to choose who you are from here on out!</span></span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Let’s Make Sure We’ve Got It</span></span></b></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">We are told many things about who we are from our family, media, friends, bullies and even ourselves</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">We can chose to accept or not accept those things we are told we are</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">We all have a divine destiny and purpose</span></span></li>
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<b><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Digging Deep</span></span></b></div>
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<span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">In the next few minutes I will lead you through a process that has freed me from the painful meanings and definitions of other people. I invite you to go through this process yourself. Find a peaceful spot, a place where you can ponder and reflect without the droning distractions that keep us locked into past definitions of who we are. By the way, although this process may only take a short period of time if we will engage with it with a full heart and the power of being present, the results of your work today with wherever you are in life will resonate well into the future and open you to your true potential. This will be critical for us to truly discover our divine purpose. Are you ready? Have you found that peaceful spot? If so, grab a pen and paper and let’s begin. </span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal;">What have you been told about who you are? </span></span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal;">What have you believed in the past about who you are and what your purpose is? </span></span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">What if you could let go of negative beliefs about yourself?</span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-style: normal; font-variant-caps: normal; font-weight: normal;">What if there is some important reason you are here and a very important role that you play in this life? </span></span></span></li>
<li>What is one thing that you have forgotten that is beautiful?</li>
<li>What is one part of you that you love? </li>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">Now that you have pondered you have the seed of transformation. Here comes the real work. In order for true transformation to occur we must take what we know into our daily lives. As Stephen Covey says “to know and to not do is really to not know at all.” Now we will take a look at some simple ways we can take what you know about who you are into your daily life. Here are a few questions to help you do that.</span></span></div>
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<li><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">What is one thing you can do to remind yourself of the one part of yourself that is beautiful and that you love about yourself?</span></span></li>
<li><span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">What will you do everyday to remind yourself about this so you never forget again? </span></span></li>
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<span style="background-color: white;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;">Now that you have begun this process of taking what you know into your daily life and have a plan of how to do it, you are ready for the next step to move forward towards your true potential. </span></span><span style="-evernote-highlight: true; background-color: #fffaa5;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-small;"><span style="background-color: white;">In my next blog I will dive into who you really are and your divine purpose in this life. I wish I had more time to explore it now but as with all things, I know it is with patience that the lessons can sink in. At this point though I hope you have a sense of how important you really are and that you do not need to accept negative messages about yourself that have been offered to you and that only you can decide to see your divine worth. As you do this you will begin to unlock your potential and see yourself as you really are. Then and only then are you capable of what the Creator has destined you to be. I know that these things are true and I’m excited for you to discover them for yourself. </span></span></span></div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-90870509762977749132016-04-04T06:36:00.003-07:002016-04-04T06:37:37.059-07:00WHAT ARE HIGHER LAWS?<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b style="font-family: Arial; font-size: 12px;">Have you ever had the feeling like there is more going on in this life than what appears to be, a sense that there really is a higher power</b> <span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: xx-small;">in whatever context you believe that to be? I’ve had this feeling all my life. It is this feeling that took me on a journey in search for answers to my big questions of why am I here and what am I supposed to be doing. My search took me to the far away land of Indonesia, to spiritual books, churches and even to sweat lodges. I found some evidence that I could not deny and some truth and yet I did not have a complete picture of what this life is really about. That is until <b>I learned one principle that made all the puzzle pieces fit together, that answered my big questions and pointed me in the direction of understanding the plan that the universe has for me and how I could work within that plan to create the life I longed for and live my purpose</b>. So what was that principle I learned that created this earth shattering collaboration with the universe? </span></span></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"></span></span> <br />
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<b><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;"></span></span></span></span></span><span style="font-weight: normal;"></span></b><span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;"> <b>It's a Pendulum Thing</b></span></span></span></span></span></h4>
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<span style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">The principle that helped me to become a partner with the creator was learning and understanding the principle of Higher Laws. What are Higher Laws you might be asking? Sound kind of flaky? Well it’s not. Higher Laws are very real and tangible. </span></span> <span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: xx-small;">Simply put, higher Laws are principles that create results that work upon a paradox.</span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: xx-small;">They are a set of laws outlined by the Creator that when we align to a Higher Law, we get an alternate result. It’s a pendulum thing. When you take a long necklace with a pendulum on the bottom and swing it, you take an action on one side by drawing up the pendulum and then release it. And what happens next? It swings right? The action that you take on the one hand creates an alternate response as the pendulum swings up the other side. It’s kind of counter intuitive. If you want the pendulum to go to the left shouldn’t you just be able to push the pendulum to the left? You can but it’s not sustainable because the moment you let go, it’s going to swing to the right. To go in the direction we want to go, we need to take an action in what seems to be the completely opposite direction. That’s how the universe set up higher laws. There is an opposite to all things. To create the results we want we must do the action that is in alignment to the Higher Law that corresponds with the result we want. </span></span></span></span>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Have I confused you enough? Let me give you an example. </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "arial";">One example of how a principle works is that p</span></span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: xx-small;">eople who are constantly looking for love and taking their own temperature to know if they are happy will not be happy. People who are looking outside themselves and trying to serve others out of pure love are happy. It’s a pendulum thing, we cannot find happiness through an inward search for happiness. Finding happiness requires us to do the opposite by looking outward to serve those around us. <b>As Mahatma Gaundi so eloquently put it, “the best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.” </b></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">I have sometimes struggled with truly understanding what higher laws are and how they affect me. Stephen Covey explains that “the fundamental idea is that there are principles that govern human effectiveness - natural laws in the human dimension that are just as real, just as unchanging and arguably ‘there’ as laws such as gravity are in the physical dimension.” </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><a href="http://brandonbroadwater.com/">Brandon Broadwater</a> helped me to understand higher laws best when he relayed a story told by Frank Koch in the <i>Proceedings</i>, a Navel Institute magazine. </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">"Two battleships assigned to the training squadron had been at sea on maneuvers in heavy weather for several days. I was serving on the lead battleship and was on watch on the bridge as night fell. The visibility was poor with patchy fog, so the captain remained on the bridge keeping an eye on all activities. </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Shortly after dark, the lookout on the wing of the bridge reported, “Light, bearing on the starboard bow."</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">“Is it steady or moving astern?” the captain called out.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: xx-small;">Lookout replied, “steady, captain”, which meant we were on a dangerous collision course with that ship. </span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">The captain then called to the signalman “signal that ship: we are on a collision course, advise you change course 20 degrees."</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Back came a signal “advisable for you to change course 20 degrees."</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">The captain said “send, I’m a captain, change course 20 degrees."</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">“I’m a seaman second class. You had better change course 20 degrees” came the reply.</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">By that time, the captain was furious. He spat out, “send, I’m a battleship. Change course 20 degrees."</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Back came a flashing light, “I’m a lighthouse."</span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">We changed course. </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">What does that story teach us about higher laws? Higher laws are like lighthouses. They are unmoving principles like gravity. We cannot change them because they are not in style or convenient or even socially preferred. As Cecil B. DeMille said “It is impossible for us to break the law. We can only break ourselves against the law.” Brandon Broadwater explains that “the reality of such principles or natural laws becomes obvious to anyone who thinks deeply and examines the cycles of social history. These principles surface time and time again, and the degree to which people in a society recognize and live in harmony with them moves them toward either survival and stability or disintegration and destruction.” So I guess the question we need to know is; in our own lives are we moving towards stability, peace and even prosperity, or towards destruction, even if that destruction is a slow disconnection with the people we love. </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Principles in Action</span></span></span></span></h4>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">There was a time in my life when I desperately wanted financial results. I recall one day doing the budget with my husband Andy. I kept looking from our bank account to our budget hoping that if I looked at it just one more time I would see something different. Tears began to well up in my eyes as I took in what I saw. Our bank account was not only reading a negative amount, it was reading a very negative amount. I looked over at Andy and he must of saw the look of despair, hopelessness and panic in my eyes as he wrapped his arms around me and said “it’s going to be okay Con, we’ll figure this out.” I felt a small bit of relief in his words but had no idea how we would ever figure it out. </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Fast forward a couple days and we are on a coaching call with our mentor <a href="http://brandonbroadwater.com/">Brandon Broadwater</a>. He had asked for an update about how things were going and as he listened intently to my fears and anxiety about our financial situation, he asked “so you want to make more money each month?” “yes” I responded. A glimmer of hope entered my mind and I thought “okay finally Brandon will help us to get somewhere.” Then Brandon asked me a question that cut to my very core and helped me begin to understand Higher Law principles. He asked “so how is your relationship?” “My relationship?” I gasped. “What does my relationship have anything to do with making more money?” Again Brandon asked with piercing truth “you want to make more money right?” “yes” I responded again now losing a little patience and grace. “Your relationship has absolutely everything to do with your financial situation.” </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">In that moment as the truth of that statement sunk into my very core I realized that I had a lot to learn about how to get results in my life. It is incredible how once Andy and I began to improve the connection in our relationship, other tangible things like money fell into place. We started to work together more on financial planning, we were more supportive of each other’s ideas and solutions, we became a team. I know that might not sound like much but for us it made all the difference. We went from being in conflict over money to being a team that worked towards creating a better future, which included more financial security. What was the result? We went from being $1200 in the hole every month to having enough money for our living expenses, savings and paying off debt. We paid debt off faster than we ever had before and at the time paid off 80 percent of our $100,000 debt in a couple of years. The best part was that we were happy together and that our capacity to love one another and work together no matter the circumstance increased. We saw Higher Laws in action as we created a healthier relationship which resulted in healthier finances. </span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Let’s Make Sure We’ve Got it</span></span></span></span></h4>
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<li><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Higher Laws are just as real as physical laws such as gravity</span></span></span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: xx-small;">higher Laws are principles that create results that work upon a paradox</span></span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">We cannot change Higher Laws, we can just break ourselves against the laws when we choose to not follow them</span></span></span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Following Higher Laws creates the results and blessings we desire in this life</span></span></span></span></li>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Digging Deep</span></span></span></span></h4>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "arial";">Whether Higher Law principles are new for you are not, here are some ideas that will help you to dig deep in your own life and apply the principles to get the results you want even more of. You can choose to ask yourself these questions, or not but I promise you that those </span></span><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: xx-small;">people who dig deep and apply what they are learning are the ones who will get results. </span></span></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">If Higher Laws principles are new to you, how can you educate yourself about them? </span></span></span></li>
<li><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">If you know about Higher Law principles, what is the next Higher Law you need to align to & what is one step you can take towards aligning within the next 24 hours?</span></span></span></span></li>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">I’m humbled and grateful to be on this journey with you. I know that as you apply the Higher Law principles that you learn, you will experience more results in your life. They may not come in your timeline, but they will come. It is a pendulum thing and a predictable law like gravity is; if we align to our Creator’s laws, we will get the attached result or blessing to that law.</span> <span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: xx-small;"><b>After all, we cannot build the spiritual muscles of the soul by sitting on the couch of mediocrity. </b></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">I promise that learning about Higher Law principle is one of the most important things we can do in this life. It is when we understand Higher Laws that we strengthen our spiritual muscles and can create the life we desire. </span><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial"; font-size: xx-small;">There are a few places that you can learn
about Higher Laws. You will find pieces of truth in many places, however one of the place I have found the most truth
is through the Higher Laws company by attending the <a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php">Master Your Power Within event</a>. </span>What an adventure life becomes when our spiritual eyes are opened and we can see things as they really are. </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">Much love,</span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">Connie </span></span></span>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-6925583225382758812016-02-12T07:33:00.003-08:002016-02-12T07:41:39.435-08:00NO GUILT RAW CHOCOLATE<div style="font-family: 'Helvetica Neue'; font-size: 14px;">
For awhile now I have been talking about how eating healthier has been a journey for me. I have always had two sides within myself battling when it comes to food. There is the part of me that knows that what I put into my body will affect how I feel, think and act. This part of myself has a true desire to eat healthy, choose the spinach smoothie over the doughnut, eat the salad over the grilled cheese. Then there is another part of me that wants everything to be fun and delicious…and is genuinely saddened by the prospect of eating green smoothies and chia for dessert every single day of my life. I can justify almost anything when it comes to food. Justifications that sound a lot like “of course I can eat cake for breakfast, I’ve been so good all week." Whenever I give in to my sugary pleasures though. my state crashes and I feel terrible. Not just because of the inevitable sugar crash afterwards…though there definitely is one, but also because of the inevitable guilt crash. <b>When I over indulge in the food department of my life, I felt guilty because I felt like I was weak for giving into my culinary pleasures.</b>
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Then I came upon a program that has changed my eating and my life. It has given me back a sense of control with juggling my desires to eat healthy while eating yummy. <b>This program has helped me to recover from decades of poor eating choices, while learning how to eat in a way that leaves me feeling full, energized and excited about food.</b> It has taught me how to eat what I love (even chocolate!) in a way that is happy and healthy and with no guilt. What is the program I am talking about? I am talking about the <a href="http://healthfixresort.com/">Healthfix Program</a>. I took part in the 30 day <a href="http://healthfixresort.com/">Healthfix program</a> and it has made such an incredible difference for my family. <b>Over the last 30 days, my husband Andy has lost over 25 pounds</b> and his hotness has increased to the “wow I’m married to that hottie!”side of the line. My daughters are asking for healthy treats and my 2 year old daughter is asking for green smoothies everyday. I have lost about 5 pounds and can finally fit into my pre-pregnancy jeans! I have so much more energy and patience with my kids. <b>I am loving to eat healthy treats that are so unbelievably chocolaty and delicious that I don’t even crave the surgery treats!</b> Okay for me this was huge!
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I was thinking about why this program has been such a game changer for me when other diets and programs have not worked for me in the past. I think it is because in the past when I have tried other dieting or weight loss programs, I felt deprived. With other programs I felt like I had to do without to win so it was a matter of willing myself to not eat chocolate cake and willing myself to work out in the morning. This kind of change based on willpower only lasted a little while before my willpower muscles got tired and I reached for a candy bar and stopped going for a run. The <a href="http://healthfixresort.com/">Healthfix program</a> is different because it gently took me through a detoxification process using all natural and healthy foods. Then it helped me learn through experience how to shop for and prepare healthy foods that fuel my body and leave me feeling full. The weekly coaching helped me understand how eating this way was helping my body heal itself. <b>The healthy food detoxification, learning how to cook in a healthy way and the coaching in the <a href="http://healthfixresort.com/">Healthfix program</a> combined to create an effect where my body naturally began to heal itself so I feel better and as my body started to change, my desires changed.</b> I began to crave the boost of energy I feel after a smoothie and I craved the healthy and yummy chocolate treats over the regular sugary kind. I'm not perfect but the thing that I love most about this program is that I don't have to be! When I am regularly eating the healthy foods my body needs, I can still eat some of my old foods favorite foods in moderation. The funny thing is though, I have replaced most of these foods with healthy alternatives anyways!</div>
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So today in the spirit of Valentines Day I wanted to share with you one of my favorite chocolatey treats that is so unbelievably simple to make. I love this recipe because it has has a number of health benefits and is is yummy vegan milk chocolate. Try it out and let me know what you think.
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<b>RAW MILK CHOCOLATE RECIPE</b><br />
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1/2 c raw honey
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1/2 c coconut oil
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1/2 c cacao powder
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1/2 tsp vanilla
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*4 tbsp full fat coconut milk (this is the solid part skimmed off a can of coconut milk that’s been refrigerated overnight)
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<li>Place all ingredients in a food processor and blend until smooth</li>
<li>If you want, add any other mixings you like (cranberries, coconut, chopped nuts, raisins) and stir</li>
<li><u>For chocolates</u>: pour into moulds to make little chocolates & refrigerate for 1 hour</li>
<li><u>For chocolate dipped strawberries</u>: dip washed and patted dry strawberries in the chocolate & put on a plate lined with parchment paper and refrigerate 1 hour</li>
<li><u>For frozen chocolate dipped bananas</u>: put a full banana on a chopstick and pour the chocolate over the banana, sprinkle chopped nuts on the chocolate if desired and put on a plate lined with parchment paper and freeze for 2 hours</li>
<li>*you can leave out the coconut milk if you want more of a semi sweet chocolate</li>
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<b>Principle in Action</b></div>
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I remember one day I was feeling kind of defeated. I stepped on the scale and didn’t see much change. I got out my measuring tape and as I measured my waist, I didn’t see as much belly fat loss as I wanted. I felt like giving up and thought “well if I am going to be the same, I might as well eat whatever I want to eat!” Then I indulged in eating some pizza…the cheesy, sloppy kind that comes in a huge brown box. I ate a slice of pizza, and then another, and then another, and then another. I ate beyond the “I’m hungry side of the line” to the “I’m so full I can’t move side of the line.” I went to bed and that night and I felt sick…really sick. I’m talking sore throat, nauseous kind of sick. I woke up the next morning, got back on track with the <a href="http://healthfixresort.com/">Healthfix program</a> of green smoothies and something incredible happened. </div>
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Within a couple hours I felt better! My sore throat went away, I didn’t feel sick anymore…like at all! I realized in that moment that when I am making a shift towards a healthier lifestyle sometimes the physical changes that I want don’t come as quickly as I would like them to but there is something bigger going on within me. It is a physical shift towards my body being in a healthier state, being more able to recover from sickness, more able to heal itself. Now I am not saying I am never going to eat pizza…I love pizza! We even have pizza night at our house still…although we use a cauliflower crust and it really is seriously delicious! I even will have the messy, cheesy, big box kind of pizza once in awhile…although I definitely learned a lesson about aligning to moderation! Maybe I’ll have some veggies first. I am saying that sometimes when we make changes in this life, we need to be patient with the results and trust that fundamental shifts are happening when we can’t see them. We need to remember the big picture and remember that the small things…feeling more energy, feeling happier are actually big things and are indeed worth it.
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<b>Let’s make sure we’ve got it</b></div>
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We have talked about some principles relating to health so let’s review to make sure we’ve got it.
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<li>We don’t need to be perfect, we just need to be striving</li>
<li>It is possible to eat healthy treats…and now you have the best yummy no guilt chocolate recipe ever</li>
<li>When we make changes in healthy eating, we get momentum and eventually we desire healthier foods</li>
<li>We need to stick with the process with patience by continuing to do the little steps towards better health </li>
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<b>Digging Deep</b></div>
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All of us have edges of where we want to grow in the area of health. Maybe we want to feel more energy, or fit into our jeans, or be alive for our grandchildren, or feel more confident. I have talked about one of the areas in my life that I have been working on. Where is an area in your life that you want to be even healthier? Grab a pen and paper and let’s explore some questions that will help you to get clarity on how to get there.
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<li>What do you want to be different in your life to be even healthier?</li>
<li>Why is this important to you?</li>
<li>What would happen if you don’t do this?</li>
<li>What is one specific daily step you can take towards this vision of a healthier you?</li>
<li>When can you do this everyday? </li>
<li>How are you going to get back up and keep taking steps towards this goal when you forget or slip into old patterns?</li>
<li>Who can support you with this goal? Maybe it’s a friend, partner or program.</li>
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Now that we have talked about some principles about health and I have given you one of my favorite healthy treat recipes...I know you are going to love this chocolate recipe and all the delicious treats it can make! I wish I could give you all the delicious recipes that I have learned through the <a href="http://healthfixresort.com/">Healthfix </a>program but there just is not room on this blog for all the juices, smoothies, dinners and treats! I just tried a raw cinnamon swirl recipe and raw chocolate brownies that are out of this world! <b>I am so grateful to learn how I can create pure moments with my family around yummy food without paying the cost of the sugar crash crazies afterwards!</b> If you would like to talk to a coach about how you could get started on your journey to health, click here.
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After you try the raw chocolate recipe please let me know what you think. I hope you have a wonderful Valentines Day that is filled with healthy yummy chocolately treats :)<br />
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Much love,<br />
Connie</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-22443047517707020752016-02-05T05:20:00.001-08:002016-02-05T05:20:08.262-08:005 STEPS TO HIT ANY GOAL<span style="font-size: 24px;"><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>The Kaizan of our lives</b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">I mentioned before that there are some specific tools that can predictably help us reach our goals. In my <a href="http://higherlivingforwomen.blogspot.com/b/post-preview?token=jw5Cs1IBAAA.vrah7m5WlfAZ3BjKrK7iOBLd5vsgZDyDhps_HiNW0cYomdDFGA4SOqoRs98O_Qgzb9rhRw3j7nmuKKClm9MF0A.DoDEOxlaiW95tTpgjcRlHw&postId=7499671472190226234&type=POST">previous post</a>, we explored the three things that get in our way to reaching our goals. These three dream stealers are lack of perspective, pride, and hopelessness. We also identified the six steps towards creating lasting change. If you remember those six steps are:</span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>C</b>reator</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>H</b>eart</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>A</b>ction</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>N</b>eed to</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>G</b>et back up</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>E</b>xcel in Kaizan</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Now that we understand those principles, <b>we can dive even deeper into the specific tools we can use daily that help us to reach our goals.</b> I recall a time in my life when I did not know about these tools and I wanted to paint my house. I had never painted a house before and I was feeling a little overwhelmed by the prospect of painting the entire outside of my house. At the time I had a small child at home with me and life was busy with naps, laundry mountains and everything else involved with being a mom. I had no idea how I was going to fit in learning to paint, buying the paint and supplies and the hours and hours it would take to finally get the job done. <b>I was stuck in analysis paralysis.</b> Ever been there? It is a quaint little place where time stands still and we think we are getting a lot accomplished because we are thinking about something a great deal but the reality is that even though we are exerting a great deal of energy thinking about getting started, we are not actually taking any action, so nothing gets done. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>Then I learned about one tool at the <a href="https://higherlaws.isrefer.com/go/3DayEvent/Andy/">Master Your Power Within</a> Event that helped me to get to work in an effective and manageable way and helped me to finish painting my entire house in just over a week while working in the cracks of time between my baby’s naps.</b> This tool helped me so much that I began to use it in every area of my life; from making sure I spent daily quality time with my kids, to writing a book. It has changed everything for me because it has helped me understand what specifically I can do to get the things I want done. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">So what it this tool? Well it is something that <a href="http://brandonbroadwater.com/">Brandon Broadwater</a> teaches at the <a href="https://higherlaws.isrefer.com/go/3DayEvent/Andy/">Master Your Power Within</a> Event called "Bullseye Times". It is part of a process that he spends over half a day teaching and although I don’t have half a day now to share with you everything he taught me, I will give you everything I can within the time we have together.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Basically a<b> Bullseye Time is a small period of time that you dedicate each day to taking action on something you want to accomplish in your life and it allows you to accomplish that goal in small, manageable, daily steps</b>. Here are the basics to succeeding at bullseye times.</span></div>
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<b><span style="font-family: "arial";">Bullseye Times:</span></b></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">Set one specific goal you want to </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">accomplish (i.e.: I will make 5 sales calls daily)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">Set a start and end time of when you will do this everyday.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">Plan to work on it between 15 min to an hour every day. We are much more effective when we are working in small bursts of time.</span></li>
<li>During your bullseye time you are taking direct action on the thing you want to accomplish. It’s not a time to plan, it is a time to do! </li>
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Now that you understand what bullseye times are, there is something else you need to know about this process. <b>If you leave this out you will have unpredictable results but add this next step to your goal planning and you will be able to hit any target.</b>
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<b>Consequences and Rewards</b></div>
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This next step is critical because if we leave it out we will not be completely driven to do whatever it takes to reach our goals.<b> All of us are either driven by pleasure or pain.</b> When we are truly motivated to change, it is either because we want to have something pleasurable or we don’t want something painful. For my husband, he is motivated by pleasure and he loves to eat good food so he would be completely motivated to do work he doesn’t necessarily enjoy to get something yummy. Pain motivation doesn’t work for him very often. He is pretty easy going and adaptable so he will just put up with less than ideal circumstances rather than it driving him forward to change it. Now for me I am motivated by pain. I will do a lot to avoid painful consequences. I like good things in my life and will work towards them but when push comes to shove, I will do anything to avoid painful things I don’t want in my life. So for us to predictably and effectively reach our goals, we need to have a motivator in place pushing us forward. If we do not put this in place, our results will be sporadic and unpredictable. If we attach consequences and rewards to our goals and are committed to following through on implementing them based on our performance, we will have a fire lit within us pushing us forward towards creating the life we desire.
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To get started, we need to find something you really want everyday. Maybe it is a special type of food, or checking your emails, or hey even brushing your teeth. Whatever it is, it needs to be something that you just can’t do without and would do anything to have it. Now what you do is attach this thing you want most of all to the goal you have. Here’s some examples of how this works. Let’s say you want to workout everyday and you also love to shower every day, you could decide that you can have a shower (reward) as soon as you workout for 15 minutes (goal). If you want to improve your relationship and you realize that you haven’t been telling your kids you love them, your could decide I can brush my teeth (reward) as soon as I tell my kids I love them (goal).
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The next step is to also attach a painful consequence to your goal if you don’t do it. By painful I don’t mean physical pain (that would be weird!), I just mean something that you don’t want that will drive you to take action on your set goal. Here are a couple examples. “I can’t have a shower (consequence) until I have exercised for 15 minutes in the morning (goal).” “I can’t check my e-mails (consequence) until after I have had my morning spinach smoothie (goal).” It is just attaching a consequence painful enough to motivate us to do whatever it is that we really want to do.
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Putting these rewards and consequences in place helps us to avoid being caught in the dream stealer trap of losing perspective because <b>they help keep us focused on our long term desires rather than short term pleasures</b>. We make it easier for us to take the small steps forward necessary to reach our goals than it is staying in comfortable complacency because the pleasure and pain that we have chosen for ourselves drives us to take those small steps. This is just awesome because it helps us to get out of our own way.
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<b>Principle in Action</b>
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I had an inspiration that I should write a book book but I found it so difficult to get started and stay in momentum. I would start writing one day and commit to writing for 5 minutes every day. I would do awesome for a couple of days and then life would get in the way and I would have the same old excuses (not enough time, energy, knowledge…the list could go on and on) and I would stop. My progress was so slow that I remember thinking the book might be finished by the time I am 95 years old! Then I learned how to use bullseye times at the <a href="https://higherlaws.isrefer.com/go/3DayEvent/Andy/">Master Your Power Within</a> event and finally understood how I could set myself up to win by simply putting a bullseye time in place and attaching consequences and rewards to it. So that is what I did. I decided that I could have a shower after I wrote in my book. After I did this I remember one time it was about 10:30 at night and Andy came outside and saw me frantically writing in my book and knowing that I normally am not writing that late, he said to me “whatcha doing?”. I told him I am writing in my book because I really want a shower!
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Even though putting bullseye times and rewards in consequences worked most of the time, I wasn’t perfect with it. I remember one time I didn’t write in my book and so I couldn't have a shower but I really needed to quickly run into Costco. So I threw my hair up in a ponytail, put on some clothes lying on the floor and ran out the door. While I was at the grocery store I saw someone that I know. At that moment, a mental checklist raced through my mind…"did I remember to put on deodorant, is my shirt clean, I think I have baby spit up on me, did I even comb my hair today?” <b>Let me tell you my friends, it only takes a couple times of running into people you know while running through the stinky pants mental checklist before you are willing to do any goal to get a shower!</b> No one wants to be the stinky, crazy hair lady! That is the power of this principle. When the consequence and reward are something that will really motivate us…we will do anything to get it done!
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<b>Let’s Make Sure We’ve Got it</b></div>
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<li>To predictably reach our goals we need to do it in small manageable steps</li>
<li>Setting bullseye times are the most effective way to take small, predictable steps towards our goals</li>
<li>For bullseye times to be effective we need to:<ol>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">Set one specific goal you want to </span><span style="font-family: "arial";">accomplish (i.e.: I will make 5 sales calls daily)</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">Set a start and end time of when you will do this everyday.</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">Plan to work on it between 15 min to an hour. We are much more effective when we are working in a small burst of time.</span></li>
<li>During your bullseye time you are taking direct action on the thing you want to accomplish. It’s not a time to plan or think, it is a time to do!</li>
<li>Attach a pleasurable reward and painful consequence to doing your daily goal</li>
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<b>Digging Deep</b></div>
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Now that we know this principle of bullseye times let’s put it into action in your life. Get a pen and paper or an electronic notebook and let’s get started!
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<li>What goal do you want to accomplish?</li>
<li>What specific small daily step can you take towards this goal? (has to be something you can daily say yes I did it or no I didn’t do it)</li>
<li>When are you going to start doing this every day? </li>
<li>How long will you do this for? (15 minutes to an hour is ideal)</li>
<li>What pleasurable reward can you attach to it if you get it done?</li>
<li>What painful consequence can you attach to it if you don’t get it done?</li>
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Now we know how to set specific, achievable goals and we understand how to break them down into small steps that we can take every day towards our goal. We also know how to set up the environment to win by putting in pleasurable rewards and painful consequences to help push us towards our dreams. I promise that when you put these things in practice in your own life, you will move faster towards the life you want to create. If you want help with becoming clear on your goals or setting specific goals in any area of your life; business, parenting, relationships, money or personal happiness <a href="https://calendly.com/andy-benjamin/initial/02-04-2016">click here</a> to register for a complimentary coaching session.
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Please let me know know how using this process works for you and the successes you have had in moving towards your dreams. <br />
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Much love,<br />
Connie </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-74996714721902262342016-01-26T07:50:00.001-08:002016-01-27T05:36:34.857-08:00THE SECRET TO ACHIEVING GOALS<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Every year especially around the beginning of January, our hearts turn to what we want to be different in our lives. This type of reflection might come in the form of a resolution, after the loss of someone we love, or in the everyday reflection of the soul. However it comes about, <b>it is the moments when we reflect on the successes, failures and things left undone in our lives</b>. In some ways this type of resolution for change has gotten a bad rap. I’m guessing that this is mostly because overly crowded gyms tends to have a quiet time around February 1st when the resolution exercise buffs have run out of steam and motivation. This doesn’t just happen in the gym though. Have you ever had a desire to change something in your life, set a goal and been really committed to making that shift for the first couple weeks and then for one reason or another….(not enough time, money, desire to get up early) and your commitment toward reaching your goals diminishes? <b>Have you ever wondered what it is that helps some people achieve their goals while others give up on the dreams they once held? </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">In the past I often pondered this universal mystery…by pondering really I mean beat myself up emotionally about why I couldn’t reach my goals. I’ll never forget the ease of burden and shame when I finally understood what principles and tools support us in reaching our goals. <b>I began to understand what I was missing in my life and the simple steps I could take to change things so that I could create the life I want</b>. I would like to share this with you today. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Before we go into that just yet I would like to tell you a story. This is a story about a man named Peter Kinch who I interviewed years ago. I love this story because it has been so essential in understanding how real change works. Peter was a very successful business man in the real estate industry. He had dabbled for years making some investments on the side and one year the market shifted and he lost everything. Not only did he lose everything but he ended up owing a great deal of money. Peter told of how this was very difficult for his family and he shared one particularly challenging story that brought tears to my eyes. He told of how during their financial downfall his wife went to the store to buy diapers. She was at the checkout paying and as she ran her bank card through the machine she was shocked and embarrassed to find that there were not enough funds in her account. <b>At that moment she realized that she did not have enough money to buy diapers for her baby</b>. Devastated she went home empty handed and faced her husband to tell him the story. In that moment he was faced with the knowledge that he could not provide enough money to buy diapers for his child and that his wife was under a tremendous amount of stress because of their financial situation. He was at a turning point in his life. He looked in the mirror and there were only two choices he could make. He could face himself in the mirror and say “what is wrong with you, how could you be such a failure.” or he could get back up, dust himself off and say “how can I make things better for my family.” He chose the second option and got to work searching for ways to make things better for his family. He got outside his comfort zone, worked hard, was committed to paying off their debt and changed their financial situation completely around. He went from being someone with no money to pay for diapers to someone who is extremely well off financially. So what was it that shifted things for Peter? Was it the opportunities that were put in front of him or was there something deeper going on? Was it him? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Why do I tell you that story? I tell you it because it illustrates how change needs to come from within us. <b>When we truly change, there is a fundamental shift that happens to us. Something that no one can take away, not one can give to us, and that makes a shift in us that is forever</b>. Our capacity changes, our heart changes and we become more than who we were before. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Before we dive into the steps we can take to create lasting change in our lives, I would like to ask you to think about a question. <b>What is one thing that you want to change in your life?</b> One thing that would make you even happier or bring you closer to your full potential? Maybe it is strengthening a relationship, maybe it is enjoying a healthier body or mind, maybe it is changing your financial situation or feeling more peace in your life. Please take a moment to think about it and find the one thing that you would be willing to do anything to have. Got it? Okay now I would like you to think about that one thing that you would like to change and write it down in way that is specific and that would allow you to easily say “yes I reached it” or “no I didn’t reach it”. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>Goal Stealers</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">So now that you have your goal in mind let me ask you a question. <b>Have you ever wondered what gets in the way of reaching your goals?</b> There are three things that predictably block our path towards our goals if we are not aware of them. When we know what they are, we can see them coming and move on to make the changes we want. Imagine that you are at the starting line of the most important race of your life…the race towards your ultimate potential. There are three large pieces of ribbon blocking your path towards the race track. You try to break through them so you can begin your journey towards your ultimate potential but you can’t. They are holding you back and every time you step forward, you push them to their limits and then they spring you back to where you were before. You think you are stuck and there is no way around them. You begin to feel like the race is hopeless and that you should just take off your running shoes and head home to sit on the couch of mediocrity, however something inside you tells you that if you just move forward with the tools you need, you will be well on your way towards reaching your dreams. You realize that if you just knew what was holding you back, you would be able to bust through them. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Today I will reveal the <b>the three dream stealers that hold us back and the six steps we can do to overcome them in any area of our lives. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>The three dream stealers are perspective, pride and hopelessness</b>. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Loss of perspective is a dream stealer because it can cause us to forget what we want and why. The dangerous thing about perspective is that when we are out of momentum even just a little bit, our perspective slips. I remember a time when I was focused on eating healthy foods and so the snacks and treats we had in the house were all healthy. I was committed to date balls and green smoothies but then Thanksgiving came and I overindulged in turkey and cheesecake. After that I wanted cheesecake everyday. I began to lose sight of my desire to eat healthier and my short term pleasures became more important. I had lost perspective. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Pride is a dream stealer because it can cause us to fall into the “all or nothing” thinking trap. This trap tricks us into thinking we have to be perfect to start and stay in the race. It allows us to beat ourselves up emotionally when we have made a mistake or when things are not changing as quickly as we would like. It is what keeps us focusing on our shortcomings rather than learning from them. It stops us from asking for help from our Creator and the people around us who can support us in overcoming the challenge we face and keeps us stuck in it. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">The last dream stealer that can block our path in the race towards our potential is hopelessness. When we give into the other two of pride and loss of perspective we can begin to give up hope and feel like nothing will work anyways. This dream stealer can cause us to stop trying and settle for a lesser version of the life we could be living. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Okay now that you know the dream stealers and you understand how they can block our path to our potential, what can we do to overcome them? It’s simple really. There are 6 steps that has helped me to be able to stick with my goals and when I use them, I am able to be in for the long haul. Before I understood them...I was a wee bit on the flaky side of the line but after I learned them, I could predictably reach my goals. Here they are...</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>C</b>reator </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>A</b>ction</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>G</b>et back up</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>E</b>xcel in Kaizan</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>1. Creator</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Yes it’s an acronym…I kind of love them because they help me to remember. So what does it mean? Well let’s break it down. Creator means that in order for us to truly change, we need all the help we can get. Sometimes the things we need to change in our lives can feel overwhelming and we wonder if we have enough strength to really make the shift. When we go to our Creator for help and express our desire to make changes, say we are sorry for the things we have done in the past that we know are wrong and ask the Creator for help…we will get it. We will get help in many ways and when we are reaching for our goals, we will be lifted by something greater than ourselves. Sometimes when I have tried this I have felt kind of silly expressing my desires and asking for help. I have thought at times “does the Creator really care if I eat a little too many Chocolate Chip Cookies? Doesn’t he have bigger things to worry about.” Then I realized that the Creator does care, because I care. He wants to help us reach our full potential and that includes working towards whatever dream is important to us. So let’s not do it alone…lets get divine help in being lifted towards our potential. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>2. Heart</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Okay now that we are working as a team with the Creator the next step helps us to be open to inspiration and help from those around us. It is a change of heart. This really means having a true desire to make the changes and having a willingness to give up everything to do it. Even pride. Why do I say pride? As we talked about before, pride is one of the dream stealers because it can cause us to fear failing and cause us to give up. It can sneak into our race towards our potential by saying things like “well now I’ve totally messed up…I might as well give up because this is not working anyways.” When we let pride be more important than our dream, our fear of failing or asking for help becomes more important than our potential. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>3. Action</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">The next step in change is one that seems pretty straight forward but often gets missed. True change requires action. If we want something to be different, we must desire different things, think and act differently. Ever wonder why we can’t lose weight by sitting watching t.v. eating popcorn? Well this is it. Change requires action and often it is the small simple actions that make all the difference. As an ancient American Aboriginal person put it “It is with small things that great things come to pass.” So it is with our lives. Take a step forward…even after two steps back and it is still progress!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>4. Need T</b>o</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">The next piece to the change puzzle is ‘need to’…what does that mean? Well it means that we have a true desire to change. It means that we have come to a moment in our lives when we can not stay in the status quo, when mediocrity no longer is an option and when some drive within us lights a fire in our soul to do whatever it takes to change. Sometimes this is a defining moment in time like going to the doctor and finding out that if we don’t lose weight, we’ll die or maybe it is a defining moment in a relationship when we realize that if things do not change we with lose the person we love, or maybe it’s a defining moment within our soul where we just know that things need to be different. However it comes about, it is shift in our motivation to do anything to accomplish what we set out to do, a hope in knowing that it’s possible to succeed.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>5. Get Back Up</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Now why is getting back up in the process to change? Um because we all fall down as we are moving towards our potential! Ever met a baby who popped out running? Nope because as babies we needed to get strong enough and learn some things before we can learn to run. Now when a baby does begin to learn to walk it is it a get up once and start walking? No way! Babies spend so much time practicing…falling down…getting back up…wobbling and finally walking. If that is how we all learn then why do we expect that when we become adults we can just do things perfect the first time? That is a crazy notion when we really think about it. When we try something new it feels awkward, we feel like we suck a little at it, we feel self conscious and we fall down. Although this doesn’t feel good, it is actually a really good thing because it means we are growing, we are getting stronger and our capacity is increasing. It takes more muscles emotionally, physically and spiritually to fall down and get back up than it does to simply stay up. So let’s redefine success. Success is getting back up fast!</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>6. Excel in Kaizan</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Excel in Kaizan. This is one of my favorites. Kazan is a Japanese word that means seeking for constant improvement. When we are constantly seeking to improve we naturally give up our pride and fear of failure and we allow ourselves to be embraced by a desire to grow, strengthen every area of life and a commitment to strive. In a future post we will dive in even deeper about how to effectively move towards our goals in small daily steps. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">So now that we have gone into depth about the things that can block our dreams, the steps of change and what specific things we can do to move towards our true potential let’s dive deep. I encourage you to write down your answers to the following questions. When we apply what we are learning to our own lives, that is when we truly get results. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>These principles in real life</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">As you have probably guessed, being healthier has been one of the goals I have had for a long time. I would often start an exercise or weight loss program only to feel frustrated at myself and my lack of results and find myself hiding in my pantry eating chocolate chips and thinking to myself “this is never going to work anyways.” All of the things that can hold us back…lack of perspective, pride and hopelessness were all guests at my chocolate indulging parties and soon after I would give up and stop trying to change. That is until I began to apply the principles of C.H.A.N.G.E. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Things began shifting for me when I realized that I was not were I wanted to be health wise and I looked at my husband who was not in the healthiest state of being and I realized that if our family continued going down the path we were headed, I would lose him. I went to my Creator and expressed a desire to learn to change, my heart softened and I became willing to do anything to make the shifts necessary to get my family on the track towards health. I began by taking action and joining the <a href="http://health-fix.com/">Healthfix program</a> so I could get support to learn how to cook and eat in a healthier way. I even learned how to make healthy treats...like raw chocolate turtles so I could make lasting changes because let's face it, I was not willing to give up chocolate! My need to change became greater than my need to stay in my comfort zone of eating the way I always had. This does not mean I am perfect. I fall down and indulge in unhealthy treats and pizz sometimes but I get back up and know that this is all part of the process. I don’t have to be perfect…as Kristen Harris once said I need to be “perfectly striving.” Since making these changes in the last month everything has changed. <b>In a few weeks being on the program my husband Andy has lost 25 pounds, I have lost 5 pounds, my skin is healthier, I have more energy…and patience with my kids</b>, and we are on a path that we feel excited about towards even better health. We are committed to making the changes for the long term while enjoying the ride. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>Let’s make sure we’ve got it</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">We’ve covered a lot so far so let’s review to make sure we’ve got it.</span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">Change comes from within</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">There are three things that hold us back in our goals towards our full potential</span><ol>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">lack of perspective</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">pride</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">hopelessness</span></li>
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<li><span style="font-family: "arial";">There are 6 steps we can take towards creating lasting change</span><ol>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>C</b>reator</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>H</b>eart</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>A</b>ction</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>N</b>eed to</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>G</b>et back up</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>E</b>xcel in Kaizan</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";"><b>Digging Deep</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">What is one thing you want to be even better in your life? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Why is this important to you? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">If you do not change this one thing in the next year or 5 years how would that affect you? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">What are you willing to do to make this change in your life? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">What is one thing you can do to make a step towards this change in the next 24 hours? </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">I know that when we are aware of the things that can stop us from moving towards our goals and we take the steps forward in C.H.A.N.G.E. we will create the shifts we want in our lives. We will experience abundance in all areas of life and we will be able to move towards our dreams in a way that is sustainable and effective.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">If you would like support in moving towards your dream, I want to support you as much as possible so I have personally arranged for an incredible person who is an international speaker and coach to give you a personal coaching session (worth over $500) to help you with any area of your life you want even better results in…finances, relationships, business or personal happiness. If you want this gift <a href="https://calendly.com/andy-benjamin/initial">click here</a> to get started. I promise it will help. I would love to hear your comments about your lesson about what I have talked about and about your dreams and how you are going to take small beautiful steps towards them. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Much love,</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial";">Connie</span></div>
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Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-10632041046935536022016-01-08T07:21:00.003-08:002016-01-08T07:22:47.287-08:00CREATE THE LIFE YOU WANT BY ASKING THE RIGHT QUESTIONS<br />
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<span style="font-size: 18px;"><b><span style="font-family: Helvetica;">Life is a State of Mind</span></b></span></div>
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I remember vividly going through life feeling like something was wrong with me because I did not feel in control of my emotions. I am a fairly passionate person, which although it can bring many blessings, it also requires temperance to be the person I want to be. I recall feeling the massive ups and downs of my emotions that seemed to turn on a dime depending on the circumstances I was facing at any given moment. If things were going my way…I felt happy and excited. If things did not work out, I was disappointed, frustrated and angry. The funny thing is that when I think back to that point in my life, it didn’t matter what circumstances I was going through, what truly mattered was the meaning I gave to the situation and how I chose to feel about it. What do I mean? I mean that sometimes the very same situation would happen but I would feel completely differently about it. I think back to one time when my daughter Zoe was acting out and she hit me. I wanted her to be respectful and felt exasperated and frustrated when she lashed out at me. As much as I hate to admit it, I started asking myself questions like “why is she disrespecting me and being such a brat?” I recall another time when Zoe was doing the very same behavior but this time I was not angry or frustrated with her. I was able to consequence her in a loving way and feel compassion towards her. So what was different? How could I feel and respond in a completely different way when the situations were the same?
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<b>Why is it that we can at times go through challenging experiences and still have compassion, love, faith and hope while at other times similar circumstances seem crushing?</b></div>
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I struggled for years trying to figure that out. I wondered how I could be more loving with my husband and my children more consistently and how I could be more of the person I wanted to be no matter what was happening in my life. I know that this life has ups and downs and I didn't want to only feel happy during the summers of my life. I desired to have the capacity to enjoy the wintry seasons of trials that would inevitably enter my life. I knew that this was critical to embracing a life of joy, authenticity and love no matter what circumstances the journey of life brought me.
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<b>In my search for answers of how to create a more happy, more loving and more consistently incredible life I finally found the answer.</b> It was in a moment when I was at the <a href="https://higherlaws.isrefer.com/go/3DayEvent/Andy/">Master Your Power Within</a> event listening to <a href="http://brandonbroadwater.com/">Brandon Broadwater</a> talk about what state of mind is and how our state of mind affects how we perceive and experience our life. He described the ups and downs of emotions that inevitably happen if we do not manage our state of mind. He then revealed the The Pillars of State that make all the difference. <b>Three pillars of state that help us to be in control of how we feel no matter what is going on in our lives</b>. As I listened to him describe the pillars over the course of an entire day I thought…I can do that. A fire lit within me and I became willing to do whatever it took to be the person I wanted to be for myself, my Creator, and my family. </div>
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<span style="font-size: 18px;"><b>Change Your Life by Asking the Right Questions</b></span></div>
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Although I wish I could go into depth about all of the three pillars, this blog is just not that long…unless you want to be reading all day. So I will do my best to share one of the pillars of state that has been pivotal for me and so many others. The first pillar of state is quality questions. When I began to understand how much quality questions affect my life I started to understand how I could use the questions I asked myself to shift how I thought and felt about my life and began to experience the joy that comes with being more able to predicatively feel joy in my life. It didn’t mean that my life became full of fluffy bunnies and rainbows all the time. It did mean that when crap was hitting the fan, I could climb my way out of the storm and even feel joy in the center of crazy town circumstances.
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To understand quality questions, we must first understand a fundamental principle about our brain. Our brains are a loyal and diligent answering machine. If we ask a question to our brain, you better believe it will generate an answer. This can be a great asset when we are asking good quality questions, but what happens when we are asking ourselves poor quality questions? Have you ever had the experience where you made a mistake…a doozy of a mistake and you found yourself asking “what’s wrong with me?” What happens next? Notice how your brain seems to go into the filling cabinet of your soul and find every single thing you have done wrong since birth?
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So now that you know that your brain will answer any question you give it and you understand that it is right there at any time waiting to give you an answer. Think about what kinds of questions you are asking yourself. Are you asking yourself questions that build you and the people you love around you up or are you asking questions that foster doubt, fear and frustration? Think back to when I began exploring state and I told a story of how I was responding to my daughter when she was acting out. When I was asking the question “why is she being a disrespectful brat?” what kind of answers do you think I got? Did these answers bring me closer to my daughter and the kind of parent I want to be? When I was able to be loving towards her even though she was acting out do you think the questions I was asking were different? What happens with our interactions with the people we love when we ask questions like “how can I be more loving” and “what am I grateful for about this person?” even when they might not be doing everything we want them to? As Brandon Broadwater says "<b>The quality of our questions direct the quality of our life."
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To understand this principle fully I would like to tell you a story. It is one that is dear to me because it helped me to fully see how powerful this principle is and how it can either destroy or save lives. Save lives? Pretty tall promise isn’t it? Well just listen to this story. To respect their privacy, I have changed the names of the people in the story.
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Kevin was married to his beautiful wife Emily and they had one child. He was going to school and had everything going for him; a family that loved him, a home and the anticipation of a future career. However even with all of these incredible things in his life he was depressed much of the time. He had difficulty getting out of bed and wasn’t enjoying spending time with his wife and daughter in the way that he wanted to. He was in a dark place that he did not know how to get out of. He was considering throwing away the most precious gift the Creator gave him and was contemplating <b>killing himself, leaving his young wife Emily widowed and his daughter fatherless.</b> This decision would change the destiny not only for himself but for everyone who ever knew him and most especially his family who loved him.
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<b>Then Kevin made a decision that would change his life forever</b>. He bumped into a friend who seemed to have a light of hope and happiness within him that Kevin had not seen in himself for a long time. He needed to know how his friend got it so he asked his friend. His friend began to enthusiastically tell him that he learned the lessons that changed his life to create more abundance, happiness and purpose at an event called Master Your Power Within and he invited Kevin to go with him. Kevin reluctantly agreed. He had no idea how much that one decision would change his destiny. As he sat back at the event listening to the speaker with his arms folded to guard him from the possibility of hope, an arrow of truth hit his soul. He sat up, began to pay attention and learned one of the lessons that would save his life. One of the lessons Kevin learned that night was the power of poor quality questions and how they were robbing him of the life he wanted. <b>He learned how by changing the questions he was asking himself, he could change how he feels and could change the destination of his life. </b>
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I caught up with Kevin years later and he shared that he is so grateful for the lessons he learned that day and for the principles that have shifted his life. He told me how he began applying the principles he learned at <a href="https://higherlaws.isrefer.com/go/3DayEvent/Andy/">Master Your Power Within</a> and that he started incorporating quality questions in his life by starting his days with “why is today going to be incredible” and implementing the pillars of state. <b>He told of how these small changes completely shifted his state of mind from a place of contemplating ending his life to a place of joy that he had never before experienced</b>. Now Kevin has two more little ones that he gets to see a lot of because he is able to work from home helping others find the hope, joy and success that they want in this life.
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Now that you’ve heard that story do you think the quality of your questions change the quality of your lives? </div>
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What kinds of questions are you asking yourself…poor quality questions or quality questions?
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How would asking “what am I grateful for?” more often affect the quality of your life?
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I know that quality questions and the other pillars of state have made a huge change in my life. As I pay more close attention to what questions I am asking myself I can more intentionally direct how I am feeling and how I chose to react. I know that you are a person of action because you are reading this blog so my challenge to you is to begin asking yourself at least one quality question first thing in the morning every day. I know that as you include more quality questions in your own life, you
will experience my joy, happiness and results that you desire. I would love to hear what you notice so please leave comments and share your experiences with us. </div>
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Much love,</div>
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Connie </div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-20520558703903467242015-12-17T07:54:00.000-08:002016-12-12T06:00:16.862-08:004 HOLIDAY STATE STEALERS REVEALED<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUe2VArhXlxye_o9Sn4Kid2T77y1K-ZheqLoBJYfOMfVvYS-T6txj5JmNQorhfl3AmH1mfnr8ZO_9uOaJxlFh1bKLZKKFv8j__i24T20InGsBLEVGqZSEhOLYVVxiAPIT0j6qonNs6nKs/s1600/Screen+Shot+2016-12-12+at+6.57.04+AM.png" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="214" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgUe2VArhXlxye_o9Sn4Kid2T77y1K-ZheqLoBJYfOMfVvYS-T6txj5JmNQorhfl3AmH1mfnr8ZO_9uOaJxlFh1bKLZKKFv8j__i24T20InGsBLEVGqZSEhOLYVVxiAPIT0j6qonNs6nKs/s320/Screen+Shot+2016-12-12+at+6.57.04+AM.png" width="320" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">When
I think about the holidays I remember seeing them through the eyes of a
child. I recall the excitement and joy of Christmas as a young one
looking up at the Christmas tree that seemed to go on forever with
it’s sparkling lights and shiny ornaments, going sledding with my family
and rushing inside with rosy cheeks for hot chocolate and cookies. I
remember the anticipation of Christmas morning and all the unexpected
wonder it would bring. I think back to that time in my life and
everything seemed to come together seamlessly…the gifts magically
appeared under the tree, the cookies wondrously appeared from
the freezer to lovely Christmas trays. <b>I didn’t know or appreciate
all the work and preparation that was going on behind the scenes to
create those memories I love so much</b>. Now I am not saying Christmas
as a child was perfect…oh no not at all..I also recall crazy family
dynamics, fights and tension too. However what I remember most about
the holidays was happy memories. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">Now that I am grown with a family of my own, it’s only natural that <b>I want to create a sense of wonder, excitement and joy in my own family</b>.
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">And yet as the holiday season rolls forward, sometimes it is difficult
not to get swept away in searching for the perfect gift, stressing over
money, spending hours making treats, and a “to do” list that begins to
seam like it is a mile long monster that will never be completed. <b> </b></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;"><b>There
have been times during the holidays when I have been so concerned with
getting things done so we could have the "perfect Christmas" that I
found myself distracted, stressed out and frustrated</b> with the very people I wanted to feel those warm cuddly feelings towards. </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">So how do we create the holiday season we so desperately desire and actually enjoy it?</span><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Before we can understand how to create the Christmas we desire, we first need an awareness of 4 </span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b>holiday stealers that will creep up on our festivities and rob us of the joy we could have</b>. When we are aware of these holiday stealers are we can spot them
before they sneak into our festivities and stop them in their tracks so
we can love the holidays. </span><span style="font-size: xx-small;">My
husband described holiday
state stealers best when he said if he could think of a holiday that
would have everyone sad, grouchy and frustrated with each other, he
would be sure to include massive doses of sugar, lack of sleep, busyness
and overstimulation. Sound familiar? So with all that stacked against
us how do we create incredible memories? <b>We identify the 4 holiday stealers and learn how we can manage them</b>. </span></span></span><br />
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><b>STATE OF MIND</b></span></span></h3>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">Holiday
state stealers are notorious for robbing us of our state of mind.
State of mind is our ability to perceive and experience our life. When
we are in a good state of mind we have an attitude of "it will work out"
even when things aren't going the way we want them to. When we have a
poor state of mind everything is harder and our patience fuse is
shorter. There are many things that can affect state of mind such as
sleep, nutrition and the language we are using. I learned about managing
state of mind to create the life I want in the <a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php">Master Your Power Within Event</a>. The speaker Brandon Broadwater spent a day on how we can manage
our state using Higher Law Principles. Although I don't have time in
this post to go through everything he covered in a whole day, I will give you a
piece of it that will help you today and throughout the holidays. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: large;"><b>4 HOLIDAY STEALERS</b></span></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">1. SWEET TRAP</span></b></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">The first potential holiday state stealer is sugar. Ever notice how much sugar is floating around at Christmas time?
I know there are a lot of opinions about sugar but I think we can all
agree that sugar has an effect on our bodies and that too much of it
probably isn't great for our health.<b> </b>If you doubt that sugar
affects the body just watch a child's behavior 40 minutes after they
have sugar. Now does this happen only with children?
Um nope...watch how you feel 40 minutes after having sugar. That's when
the low kicks in and life does not seem quite as lovely. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: x-small;">2. SLEEP SNARE</span></span></b></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">What
is the next state stealer to be on the look out for that can rob us of Christmas magic? Sleep...or rather lack of sleep to be specific.
I remember many Christmases waking up with overtired, heavy eyelids
after staying up to the wee hours in the morning wrapping gifts and
finding wide eyes filled with excitement and anticipation staring back
at me. My daughter Zoe had been awake for a long time just waiting for
her overtired parents to roll out of bed and finally when she was tired
of the wait she thought it best to do the sure fire "stand and stare" at
us until we got up. Seeing her there with full anticipation in
her eyes, we could do nothing other than pour ourselves out of bed in
hopes that Christmas magic would kick in and banish our overtired
headaches. <b>I had prepared so much the night before in hopes for everything to be “perfect” that I missed what I wanted most. </b> I
missed being present with my daughter during Christmas morning. So
what’s the answer? How do we avoid the sleep snare this holiday
season…we do all we can to get enough sleep and help our kids get enough
sleep. <b>A rested family is a happy family. </b></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><b>3. MORE IS NOT BETTER</b></span></span></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">There
is one last state stealing culprit that if we don’t deal with, it will
tangle the joy of the holidays. This is one trap that society seems to
push for so hard this time of year. It is one that guilts us into
buying too many presents, and going to every possible holiday event we
hear about. It is one that can rob us of what we truly want during the
holidays whether that is to remember the spiritual gifts that the
Christmas season represents or be closer to the people we love. So what
I am talking about? I’m talking about <b>the impulse to overdo Christmas.</b>
Overdo Christmas…what do I mean? <b>I mean overshot, overbuy, over
schedule, over eat, over stimulate.</b> I’m talking about rather than
simplifying the season…stuffing the season with more. What are the
costs of experiencing the holidays in this way? Stress, frustration,
fear of finances and a difficulty truly enjoying the holidays. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">4. PERFECTION MYTH</span></h3>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">I don't know what it is about the </span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;">holidays</span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"> but we can often feel like everything needs to be perfect for it to be good. We search for the perfect gifts, we plan the perfect meal, we want the picture perfect family. However the reality is that it is never perfect! In fact we are never perfect! We aren't meant to be. Life is meant to be a little messy and it is okay. When we are stuck in thinking things need to be </span></span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;">perfect, we miss the messy and beautiful wonder of the here and now. The moment when none of the kids are smiling in the Christmas photo and you look over at your partner and laugh at the crazy Christmas sweater you are wearing that your Aunt Greta gave you. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><b><span style="font-size: xx-small;">HOLIDAY STEALERS IN ACTION</span></b></span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: 14px;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> </span></span></span></h3>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">Weeks before a party I was hosting I spent hours making Christmas treats, cleaning my house to perfection and buying
gifts for everyone who was coming. And by the time the party arrived…I was exhausted. I
rushed around making sure punch bowls were filled, treats were stacked
and everything was cleaned. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">And I missed it. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">At one point I remember
looking around and seeing all my friends and family having a great time
talking with one another and <b>I realized that I hadn’t really
connected with anyone and that I just wanted everyone to leave because I
was tired and wanted to go to bed</b>. Now was that the snuggly
Christmas feeling I was going for when I was planning the party? Heck
no! I wanted to be closer to the people I love the most, I wanted to
feel that Christmas spirit enter my heart. <b>I missed it because I wanted things to be “perfect”</b>. I’m grateful for that memory because it has been a constant reminder for me to <b>simplify the Christmas season so I can actually enjoy it</b>. </span></span></div>
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<b style="font-family: times, 'times new roman', serif;">DIGGING DEEP</b></h2>
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<span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">Okay so now you are armed with knowledge about the <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">holiday stealers <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">that are lurking about trying to take <span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">away your holiday fun<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;">. Now that you are aware of the things that can take out your holiday cheer, you can make a decision about how you can manage them so that you can experience the full spirit of Christmas this holiday season. It will take some work though. Managing these holiday state stealers takes some planning and a willingness to break through old patters. To help you on this path, I encourage you to answer the following questions to come up with a plan that will work for you this holiday season. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<li><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">What is one thing you can do to manage the sweet trap? (</span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">Maybe</span><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;"> it is making healthy holiday treats so you have options or maybe it is having treats before bedtime to avoid the sugar crash)</span><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"> </span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">When can you commit to going to bed so you get enough sleep?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">What is one way you can simplify the holidays?</span></li>
<li><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;">How can you remind yourself that the holidays aren't supposed to be "perfect"?</span></li>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">I
know that doing these things has made a makes a huge difference in helping us love the holidays again. I know that as find
ways to avoid the holiday stealers and find more ways to be even more
present and create a simplified holiday season, you will feel more
peace, joy and happiness this Christmas. I wish you and your family all
the love and happiness that your heart can hold this holiday season. </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">Much love,</span></span></div>
<span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "times" , "times new roman" , serif; font-size: xx-small;">Connie </span></span>Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-16987934507239982732015-03-31T12:54:00.000-07:002017-01-09T10:14:10.894-08:00THOUGHTS ON BRANDON BROADWATER - HIGHER LAWS SEMINAR<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif; font-size: x-small;">My thoughts on the "<a href="http://higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php" target="_blank">Master Your Power Within</a>" seminar</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Brandon Broadwater and Higher Laws</span></span></h2>
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<b>Have you ever had an unexpected person show up in your life that taught you exactly what you needed to learn in the very moment that you needed it? </b>Brandon Broadwater is that person for me. I will never forget the first time I met him. A friend of mine invited me to the Master Your Power Within Event. As she enthusiastically raved about the speaker and how her life had completely changed because she went to the event I could tell that she was edging towards inviting me to attend.<br /><br />I was reluctant to go to yet another event, especially after I had been burned so many times before by other speakers making grand promises of happiness, freedom and prosperity ending with only disappointment and a jaded view of undelivered promises.<br /><br /> I wondered how Brandon Broadwater could possibly be any different than what I had experienced before. I agreed to go to the Higher Laws event not knowing that my life was about to make a shift larger than anything I thought was possible and in a direction that would take me on a journey of adventure, hope and peace that would transform me forever.<br /><br />The day of the Master Your Power Within Event arrived and as I looked up at the man on the stage, I thought "what's this guy going to teach me about life?" Then I saw something that I hadn’t seen before in all the past trainings I had gone to, I was shocked by the genuine look in his eyes and I started to ask myself “is it possible that this guy could be different?” As he began to speak, I felt the gentle arrows of truth pierce my soul. I could see that he cared about the people in that room and a seed of hope started to grow within me that maybe he would be able to help us create real change. Slowly my heart began to soften as if each truth he shared washed away one protective layer surrounding my heart at a time. This could not have been easy, as I had spent the better part of the last two decades allowing layers to accumulate in an attempt to protect what I so desperately wanted healed. He created opportunities for us to discuss my lessons with other participants and this allowed me to really process the principles he was teaching and get a clear picture of what I wanted different in my own life. <br />
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<table align="center" cellpadding="0" cellspacing="0" class="tr-caption-container" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto; text-align: center;"><tbody>
<tr><td style="text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL1t5Al04S8QnBQ83vnb25jKbvPt8ExOIMVaqUG_tLKRbm_syW8QDIapQ6nEWqstRlo8gkgL-gmPnOgmxC_WPXfTo7guEK7q7MDnVcH6uCMMH0necHVXkI9KpxaYFrcX919Xa48QjSoPA/s1600/Brandon+Smiling+Arms+Open+-+Canada+2015.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: auto; margin-right: auto;"><img alt="Brandon Broadwater at Master Your Power Within Higher Laws seminar" border="0" height="266" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjL1t5Al04S8QnBQ83vnb25jKbvPt8ExOIMVaqUG_tLKRbm_syW8QDIapQ6nEWqstRlo8gkgL-gmPnOgmxC_WPXfTo7guEK7q7MDnVcH6uCMMH0necHVXkI9KpxaYFrcX919Xa48QjSoPA/s400/Brandon+Smiling+Arms+Open+-+Canada+2015.jpg" title="Brandon Broadwater at Master Your Power Within Higher Laws seminar" width="400" /></a></td></tr>
<tr><td class="tr-caption" style="text-align: center;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Brandon Broadwater teaching at Master Your Power Within event - Higher Laws seminar</span></td></tr>
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As my heart softened, I began to inch forward on my chair engaged the stories Brandon Broadwater told of his journey of going from a struggling student to becoming a millionaire by the time he was 29, and stories of lessons his wife Lesly taught him about creating loving and lasting relationships. <br /><br />As Brandon Broadwater spoke something incredible happened, I began to understand why my life had gone in directions that I didn’t want it to go in the past and exactly what I could do to get it back in the direction I wanted it to go in. For the first time in as long as I could remember I felt excited about the future and hopeful about what was in store for my family as I continued on this path to discovery. So I listened and had my life change faster than I could have imagined.<div>
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<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-large;">My Life Before Master Your Power Within</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></h2>
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<span style="font-family: helvetica;">There was a time when my life seemed perfect. I was married to the most amazing man I had ever met, we were completely in love with each other. </span><b style="font-family: helvetica;">We got married and I thought that the connection and love we felt for one other would just keep getting better. </b></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><br /></span></span></b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><b>Then as the years passed and after the birth of our first child, I noticed something shifting.</b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">It was unnoticeable at first, just a few more hours watching television each night, a few date nights missed. Eventually it seemed as though the color we once had in our relationship was slowly draining out and we did not know where the paints were to add more. </span></span><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">My husband who I had once looked at as the epitome of what I wanted in a man started to lose his luster as my endless pleas for help and support fell short. <b>I was emotionally and physically disconnected from the one person I needed the most and the more he desperately tried to connect with me through physical touch, the more I withdrew from him</b>. I was resentful, disappointed and hurt and my husband Andy felt like he was failing me, frustrated and rejected. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">On top of the frustration that was building within our marriage, I was caught off guard with the realization that our first daughter, who I so desperately wanted had a mind of her own that didn’t jive sometimes with what I wanted her to do. <b>The "What the Expect When You’re Expecting" book had not prepared me for hours of crying, wakefulness and isolation that occurred as I desperately tried to survive my new parenting role.</b> I remember many nights sitting in the dark bouncing my screaming child on the edge of bed with tears streaming down my face and looking over at my sleeping husband with resentment and bitterness growing in my heart.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">The home and lifestyle that we wanted and saw our friends enjoying became more difficult to afford and so we compensated with magical credit that we did not have a plan to pay off. The stress of our financial situation carried with it such a weight that I would cry every time I worked on our budget as I struggled to find a way to dig our way out of the financial hole we were in. <b>At one point I recall feeling a sense of utter anxiety as I was faced with the realization that we were nearly $100,000 in debt and we were going deeper in debt by $1200 every month. I saw no way out</b>. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><br /></span></span><span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">I remember at one point sitting on the couch with my husband Andy watching television, I looked over at him and paused the show. Then I said something to him that I will never forget and that made us both become aware of the depth of the situation we were in and the need for us to do something different. <b>I turned to him and I said “Is this all there is?” There was a stunned and hurt look in his eyes as he began to comprehend my dissatisfaction with our life and our need to change things. </b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><br /></span></span></b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">At that moment we knew things needed to be different but we had no idea how to recover from our dissatisfied marriage, regain financial control, and find joy and peace in our lives again.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";"><br /></span></span></b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;">Then I met someone who would change the course of</span> <span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: 12px;">our lives</span> <span style="font-size: xx-small;">forever</span><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;"> and give us the answers we longed for about how to create abundance in all areas of life; financially, in our relationship, in our parenting roles and in our ability to have purpose and </span><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";">happiness in this life.</span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";"><br /></span></span></b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">I am so grateful for the struggles we went through because it began a process of lasting change. <b>The pain of our situation allowed us to have the desire we needed to find tools and support to create life we want and gave us the hope and trust we needed to attain it. </b></span></span><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";">The help came in the form of an unexpected teacher. Once we began being students again and learning how to create a life of connection, abundance, and hope, our lives shifted beyond what I believed was possible. <b>The joy I felt I had lost returned with a greater measure than before.</b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
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<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">So what has changed since meeting <a href="http://brandonbroadwater.com/">Brandon Broadwater</a>? Everything! </span></span></b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: x-large;">Changes in Me</span></b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></h2>
<span style="font-family: helvetica;">The
biggest change that has happened is within me. I used to feel like I
was on an emotional roller coaster, being pulled around by the
circumstances and feelings of the day. I didn’t understand how to have
my priorities in order and how to turn things around when I was in a rut
in my life. </span><b style="font-family: helvetica;">As Jim Rohn once said “for things to change, I must change. For things to be better, I must be better.”</b><span style="font-family: helvetica;"> So that is exactly where I started to create lasting change in my life. </span><b style="font-family: helvetica;">I began working on changing myself, and doing that one thing created momentum that allowed everything else to fall into place.</b><span style="font-family: helvetica;">
As I learned how to manage my priorities, I became empowered because I
realized that although I could not control all the things that happen to
me, I can control my response to them. </span><b style="font-family: helvetica;">At the <a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php" target="_blank">Master Your Power Within event</a>
I learned about the 4 primary laws of success, which helped me to
finally understand why my life was not going the way I wanted it to and I
learned the specific steps to take to create the life I want.</b><span style="font-family: helvetica;"> A
life centered around giving and feeling loved, helping those around me
and being connected to my creator. I can honestly say that because of
the principles I learned at the Master Your Power Within event,
everything shifted for me. I fell in love with my husband again, I found
the joy in being a mom that I so desperately desired, our financial
situation completely turned around and I felt the true happiness I
longed for.</span></div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-large;">Changes in My Marriage</span></b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></h2>
<span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><b>Now my relationship with my husband Andy is better than the day we got married.</b>
He knows what to do to be my hero and I know what to do to hit his
heart and make him feel loved. Our relationship has completely turned
around in all areas...emotionally, spiritually and yes...even
physically! </span></span><span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"> <span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">One
of the moments that made me realize just how much life had changed was
one day in a coffee shop when I received an unexpected email. I was
waiting for some girlfriends for lunch and opened my e-mail to keep
myself occupied in the busy cafe. I saw an email from Andy and when I
clicked on the button to open the e-mail I was overcome by the
thoughtful and vulnerable message that was waiting for me. You see,
Andy hates writing poetry but he loves me and he knows how much I love receiving
a poem written for me. So despite his dislike in writing poetry, he
had painstakingly written me a love poem. As I began reading his words,
a feeling of being loved so deeply welled up inside of me and I started
to tear up. In that moment my girlfriends arrived and saw me sitting
alone at the table with tears welling in my eyes. They asked me what was
wrong and when I said "it's Andy", they wrongly assumed the worst
because that's the common story is this world. When I explained that
Andy had sent me a love poem, an audible awe drifted across our table
and as they read the poem they began to tear up too. In that moment
Andy had shown me that he cared more about hitting my heart than he did
for his own comfort and since that day he has done so many incredibly
loving gestures that have brought us closer together. <b>As my husband
Andy has won my heart over, I have been entirely motivated to show him
how much I love him and let him know that he has become the man of my
dreams. </b></span></span></div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<h2>
<span style="font-size: x-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><b><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-large;">Changes in Parenting</span></b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></h2>
</div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">After learning some principles about state management at the <a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php" target="_blank">Master Your Power Within event</a>, I went from being the angry, stressed out mom to becoming</span><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> <span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">more of the mom I wanted to be with more patience and love for her than I knew possible</span><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">.
I remember one time feeling particularly mad at the massive atomic
meltdown that Zoe was having in our kitchen. I could feel the
frustration well up inside me to the point where my face was getting
hot. In the past I would have broke down in frustration and yelled at
Zoe even though that’s not how I wanted to handle things. Since learning
the 5 keys to having an amazing state at the worst of times, I knew
there was a different way I could go. A way that would leave me feeling
more empowered as a parent and Zoe feeling more loved. So I stopped in
the chaos of Zoe screaming and started doing jumping jacks in our
kitchen. Zoe looked up with me shocked by what she was seeing and in a
moment of disbelief her tantrum stopped and her mouth hung open. The
next things she did was started doing jumping jacks with me! Now we were
both in the kitchen doing jumping jacks together and laughing! <b>From that one decision, the destiny of our entire day changed. </b></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
</div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica";"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;"><b>Now
years later I have two more little ones and although logically I should
be more stressed out, I’m not. I feel much more relaxed and have more
fun with my kids in small daily moments of joy throughout the day</b>.
I’m not perfect but when I make a mistake, I get back up fast and do the
next right thing. I have pure moments built into my day now that bring
me so much happiness. Zoe and I have a ritual that we sit on our two
seater swing in our back yard for her night time snuggle time. We grab a
cozy blanket and cuddle together under the stars while I tell her what I
love about her and ask about her favorite part of the day. Zoe often
tells me her favorite part is “right now”. Sitting under the stars
cuddled in a blanket talking about her day allows us to end the day on a
high and have a small daily routine that brings us closer together. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<h2>
<b style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: x-large;">Changes Financially</span></b></h2>
</div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Our finances have totally turned around too! Before attending the <span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";"><a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/events_3_day_event.php" target="_blank">Master Your Power Within event</a>, we were in the hole $1200 a month and in debt close to $100,000. </span> <b>After
applying the principles that Brandon Broadwater taught us we have paid
off more debt than we ever have before (around $90,000)</b><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";"> and in </span>a place where we can save 10 percent of our income & give away <span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";">over 10 percent of our income</span>. </span></span><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> <span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">We
were able to move out of survival mode to create the life of our dreams
with traveling to places like Hawaii and Disneyland and moving to a
beautiful warm place with palm trees.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
</div>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;"><b>Using
the principles of the 4 keys of business I was able to replace our
employment income so I could live my dream of staying home to raise our
kids.</b> </span><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Andy
was able to replace his income from his job too and now he is able to
be home with us so he no longer misses out on midday milestones like
seeing our little baby Arya walk for the first time! </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<h2>
<b style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="font-size: x-large;">Changes in Health</span></b></h2>
</div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">We
were always relatively active people but never had a beat on
eating healthy food consistently. Our vision of healthy eating was a
salad with our burgers. Andy was told by his doctor that he would need
to lose a great deal of weight and that his hereditary cholesterol
problem would require him to go on medication. His doctor was not
optimistic that dietary changes would stop him from needing to go on
medication. He thought he would try anyway.</span><span style="font-size: xx-small;"> <span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;">Then we learned about the HealthFix program at a Higher Laws event and everything shifted for us. <b>Since</b></span> <span style="font-family: "helvetica"; font-size: xx-small;"><b>participating in the 30 day <a href="http://healthfixresort.com/" target="_blank">Healthfix program</a>,
Andy has lost over 25 pounds, reversed his cholesterol condition so
that he does not need to take medication and is looking pretty smoking
hot to this happy wife. I have lost over 5 pounds and can finally fit
into my pre pregnancy jeans and have more energy than I ever have
before.</b> Our family now knows how to have family bright futures
around healthy food and our kids get pretty excited about vegan
milkshakes and green smoothies. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
</div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<h2>
<span style="font-family: arial, helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: x-large;">Changes in My Spirituality</span></span></h2>
</div>
<div style="font-family: "helvetica neue";">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;">The principles I learned from <a href="https://www.facebook.com/TheHigherLawsCompany" target="_blank">Higher Laws</a> helped me go from a place of having a distant, blaming relationship with <span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";">God</span> to a place where I know and feel connected and loved by the Creator. <b>I finally know my purpose in this life and am living that purpose</b>. I feel more happiness and peace than I ever have before.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></div>
<div style="font-family: "\"arial unicode ms\"";">
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: 12px;">I
know that Higher Laws principles change lives so if you would like more
happiness, more financial freedom, more love and connection, more
purpose in your life, I encourage you to attend a free <a href="ps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Al9blIqx4BY">Path to Prosperity Workshop</a> in your area. <a href="ps://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Al9blIqx4BY">Path to Prosperity workshops</a>
are 2 hour free workshops that cover some important Higher Laws
principles. You also get a free catered meal when you attend the
workshop! To find out more information or register for the next Path to
Prosperity workshop in your area, call 702-577-1675.</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">I cannot say how grateful I am for Higher Laws and the difference <span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";">it has </span>made in my life. Since my first event f<span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";">ive</span>
years ago I have had the opportunity to get to know <a href="https://www.facebook.com/BrandonBroadwatersPage" target="_blank">Brandon Broadwater </a>
and his family personally and I am constantly in awe of how much love
they have for each other and the people they serve. It truly is
an honor to know Brandon and to have learned the lessons Higher Laws
taught me <span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";">so that I could</span>
create the life I have always dreamed of. So thank you, Brandon
Broadwater, for helping me to create a life of adventure, passion,
connection and love. </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><br /></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span>
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Much love,</span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "arial" , "helvetica" , sans-serif; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms"; font-size: xx-small;"><span style="font-size: 12px;"><span style="font-family: "arial unicode ms";"><span style="font-size: 12px;">Connie </span></span> </span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span></span><br />
<br /></div>
</div>
Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com17tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-17286910524637730662015-03-20T12:28:00.002-07:002015-03-23T15:37:54.565-07:00TOP REASON WOMEN COME LAST...AND HOW TO COME FIRST!In today's society women come last. Who are the biggest culprits creating this epidemic of stressed out and overwhelmed proportions? Is it egotistical men? How about society? <br />
<br />
<b>Nope it's actually women putting themselves last.</b> What?! Did I really just say that. You bet! So how can I make a crazy claim that women come last because of women? I can because I have done this myself and have seen so many women make this deadly mistake. It is in the very nature of the feminine to put others before herself...often to the detriment of her health, overall well being and the relationships she desires the most.<br />
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<b>So what is the answer to this epidemic of women being over worked, over tired, over stressed and coming in last? </b><br />
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It's simple...by aligning to one principle women are able to take back their lives and feel more happy, more in control, more connected with the people they love and...wait for it...this is a gooder...actually enjoy life! <br />
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Before I dive into the one principle that allows women to experience this level of effectiveness, peace and joy let me ask you a question. When you think of the main priorities that a women faces such as being connected to a higher power, herself, kids, partner and public (everyone else). Who usually comes first? Usually kids come first, then partner, then public, then herself and a connection to a higher power. What is the result of this? Feelings of resentment towards her partner (any wonder that 50% of marriages end in divorce?), frustration with parenting, lack of energy and feeling overwhelmed. <br />
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So what is the answer so that women can come first in a happy, healthy and productive way? <b>What sets women free to feel more joy, love and effectiveness in their lives? </b>Well when I learned about this principle at the <a href="https://higherlaws.isrefer.com/go/3DayEvent/Andy/">Mastering Your Power Within 3 day event</a> with Higher Laws, I went from being disconnected from my husband, stressed out with my daughter and feeling like everyone was pulling me in a million directions to a place where I now have the energy and love needed to create a marriage that's better than the day we got married, I love being home raising my kids (now I have two and one on the way so I needed all the help I could get!) and I actually want to help those around me because I have the energy to do it! <br />
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Okay I promised you the principle that completely shifted everything for me and so many of the women I have worked with as a master coach so here it is. <br />
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<b>What sets women free to come first in their own lives is to change our priorities to a happy, health and productive order. </b>So what is that order? It is having a connection with the divine or Creator first, taking care of yourself, then your partner, then kids, and then everyone else. Sounds good in principle doesn't it but you might be wondering how do I actually do that when I have a million things to do and my to do list looks like a scary two headed monster. I promise you that it is easier than you think and when you do it you will have the energy you need to not only slay that two headed monster to-do list but actually enjoy life while doing it! All you need to do is follow these four simple steps. <br />
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<b>4 Steps to Happy, Healthy & Productive Priorities</b><br />
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1. Creator - Find one thing to connect with your Creator first (prayer, meditation, saying thanks)<br />
2. Yourself - Do one thing everyday that gives you more energy (walk, find 5 things your grateful for, health smoothie)<br />
3. Partner - Do one thing to connect with your partner (share 1 thing you admire about him, give a hug)<br />
4. Parent - Find one way to hit your kids hearts (tickle little ones, ask how their feeling, give a hug)<br />
5. Public - Do one thing to serve someone outside your family (help someone, smile)<br />
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I promise that as you shift your priorities using the 4 Steps to Happy, Healthy & Productive Priorities you will have more energy, get more things done (the most important things) and you will feel more love for the people around you. So ladies stop coming in last and start putting yourself first so you can create the life you want!<br />
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If you want a free coaching session to find more ways to create even more peace, effectiveness, financial success and happiness in your relationships e-mail andy@higherlaws.com. <br />
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Connie<br />
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<br />Anonymoushttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08125745885448961654noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-7276678405582656121.post-10338462139511351282015-03-02T13:58:00.002-08:002015-03-23T12:34:42.281-07:00UNLEASH THE HERO IN YOUR MAN!<div>
<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">The biggest complaint most women have is than men in their life simply won’t step it up. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><b>The secret that most women don’t know is that they hold the keys to unleashing the hero within their man</b>. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><b>The best part is that the key is to unleashing the hero in your man is in four simple steps.</b> </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">With the four steps to unleashing your man you will learn here, you will be able to not only ask for what you want but will actually get it! When I didn’t know about these four steps to unleashing your man I was frustrated, angry and resentful about why my husband would not do what I asked him to do. Once Brandon Broadwater shared these four steps to unleashing your man with me, it was incredible how my husband Andy went from being the guy I would nag to clean up the kitchen to being the guy that would do anything to clean up the kitchen because he knew it was important to me. <b>He became my hero! </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><b>The first step in unleashing your man is seeing him in a positive light. </b> For most people this change needs to come from within first so where do you start when you just see the dirty clothes he left lying on the floor and his breathing sounds annoying? Start by thinking about 1-3 things you admire about him everyday…go on ladies you can find 1 thing! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><b>The second step is to tell him in a way he can hear! </b>Have you ever had the experience of trying to talk to your partner only to feel completely unheard as he vacantly watches sports or his favourite show? That is because you are not using your full feminine power and speaking in a way he can hear. What do I mean? Let me ask you a question…do men live in the emotional or the physical world? The physical right? <b>So if you want him to hear you…you gots to touch him!</b> I’m not talking about anything sexual so get your minds out of the gutter! Touch the back of his neck, arm or shoulder before you open your mouth and just watch what happens. When I first tried this out with Andy, his head spun around so fast to listen to me that I was a little concerned about whiplash! </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><b>The third step to unleashing your man is to tell him what you admire about him.</b> How often do we think something kind and loving about someone and we don’t tell them? When I first tried this Andy was sitting at the kitchen table, his body was hunched over his work. I walked up, touched the back of his neck and immediately got his attention. Then I looked him in the eyes and told him what I admire about him. I said “Andy I really admire how much you love us and are willing to do anything for us.” You know how he responded? Have you ever seen those foot pumps for air mattresses? You know the kind where you step on it and then a puff of air goes into the mattress? Well giving Andy those admirations was just like pumping him up. I said the first one and he sat a little taller, then the next one he started smiling and by the third one he had a huge grin on his face and his chest was puffed out a little. He was the man! <b>It was as though a switched turned on within him and this hunger to hit my heart was lit within him. </b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><b>The fourth step is to ask for what you want</b>. Ladies how can we expect our men to read our minds? The only way to get what we want is to ask for it in a way he can hear. So how do we do that? <b>Ask for one specific thing!</b> How I did this with Andy is I said “There’s just one small thing that if you did it, it would totally hit my heart. If you could clean up your dishes when you’re done.” You know what he did? He did it! He cleaned up his dishes because he felt admired, and he knew how much it meant to me. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';"><b>So what are the 4 steps to unleashing your man? Here’s a recap...</b></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">1. Find 1-3 things you admire about who he is as a person (loving husband, devoted dad)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">2. Touch him (back of his neck, arm, shoulder)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">3. Tell him what you admire about him!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">4. Ask for one specific thing you need (“there’s one small thing that if you did it would hit my heart. If you could pick up your socks it would mean so much to me.”)</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">I know that if you follow the four steps to unleashing your man you will find even more love and fullfillment in your relationship and your man will be even more of the hero he can be. I am so grateful for learning about these 4 steps to unleashing your man at the <a href="https://higherlaws.isrefer.com/go/3DayEvent/Andy/">Mastering Your Power Within 3 Day Event</a> with Higher Laws. I wish I could give you everything that I learned there that took my marriage from “okay” to "better than the day we got married” but <a href="http://www.higherlaws.com/aboutUs.php">Brandon Broadwater </a>uses an entire day to cover the higher laws of relationships. I can tell you this though…start with the 4 steps to unleashing your man and I promise you will be shocked at how much more willing your partner is to do the things you need him to do!</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Interested in more information about how to have even more love in your relationships and you want a complimentary coaching session with a master coach call 702-577-1676 or e-mail andy@higherlaws.com.</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Use the 4 steps to unleashing your man and tell me how it goes! I would love to hear your stories. </span></div>
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<span style="font-family: 'Times New Roman';">Connie</span></div>
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